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sherrytharp 
10:23pm, July 1, 2009
I am so sad and hurt today. Today is the first day I have cryed. I am so angry, about so much. I am on the edge and I am so close to giving up. I just dont know how much I can take. I am so tired of being sick and tired.
I thinks it time to get my final things ready. Just in case all these therapys dont work. I need to write notes to all my kids so they know how I really feel about them. Get the music together, all my last wishes together, my will, living will. It seems so mobid, but necessary. They say everyone should have these things in place, I have the will but should have it updated.
Im just so weak...so so so weak. Im not sure if anyone in my family really gets it or really cares. If they do they dure have a funny way of showing it.
Comments
Sending a hug your way hon. Just try and take it one day at a time. This is hard on your family too, maybe they just dont know what to do or what to say, who really does at a time like this. I wish I had som answers for you. Just stay as strong as you can and know that we are all thinking of you.
gjet68
Praying things will get better for you...God be with you.Sending you a big hug.
mamadeb64
aw, i'm so sorry you are feeling this way.. but your allowed to have a day or two where you feel like this.. just do like gjet68 said, take one day at a time, don't give up yet.. too many people love you.. and i'm sure your family is scared and has no idea how to cope.. prayers going out for you and your family .. God Bless
budjaz
I agree with what everyone has said so far and I am praying for you and your family as well.
I think it's a good idea to prepare for the worst and hope for the best. Writing a letter to your kids sounds like a wonderful idea.
The "funny way of showing it" is very common. I am sure they don't really get it but I am also sure they really do care!
Best wishes and a hug,
God Bless you,
Sharon
mooseyinn
I agree with Sharon, "prepare for the worst and hope for the best!" I also think writing letters to each child or one to all of them, is a fantastic idea. It might be a good idea for other family members, too.
Their "funny way of showing it" is their fear, hurt and grieving for you. When people don't know what to do or say when someone they love is sick and hurting, they stay away. It usually doesn't occur to them what effect it had until it's too late.
I know you are so angry and tired of all of the sickness and the loss of control over your life. Try to understand that the ones you love do love you, they just don't know how to help!
Keep the faith! Rebecca
Sunnybrook35
Sherry, I so sympathize with you..Sad to say some families don't 'get it'. I've been to the edge, so to say and I've had to get my affairs in order... But,Thank GOD He spared my life over and over again. There is always HOPE, You my friend MUST keep the faith & hope ! Stay STRONG ! Please know we care about you,and you are in my thoughts & prayers. HUGS :)
mm5057
I understand the being so tired of being sick and tired. Please know that God loves you and he does not or did not intend on us to ever suffer the way we do. I don't know the answers as to why we do. All I know is when you are weak lean on us and maybe someday when I need to lean I can lean on you. I lean on God but remember he was not meant to be our crutch he was meant to be our everything
hopeisalive