lem333

Close Depression
: Clinical (Major) Depression

I thought everyone was miserable. I was diagnosed with depression at 19 when I for the first time in my life I knew I was happy and that always miserable thing wouldn't go away. I was physically ill, couldn't leave my bed without sleeping 18 hours. I'm 26 now and recently found out the depth that depression and bipolar disorder really runs in my family.

Treatments

Celexa Somewhat Helpful

It was the first drug I tried and it was a miracle. Although it only worked for a few years and then I had to up my dosage and then pretty soon I was back where I started...it was all worth those first few years of relief. Putting a name to the face that had beat me.

Cymbalta Working / Worked

Ive been on it for 4 yrs & I feel level. I dont want to say I LOVE it but I feel perfect...not drugged, not necessarily stable, but I FEEL LIKE MYSELF. However, if I god forbid miss 2-3 days (like I might've done as a carefree college student), I am screwed. I cry, I yell, I get vertigo, I feel as if I am withdrawing off of HEROIN!!! I make everyone around me feel horrible & the worst part is...I don't want to help myself. I won't let people pick up the Rx for me...my mind plays tricks on me.

Psychotherapy Working / Worked

The therapist is there to listen to you. No judging (if you find the right one--crucial), no regrets. Forget social niceties about making sure you aren't freaking out your friends, asking about their day, yada yada. Also, a good therapist will pump you up to get you to open up so flattery never helps. Lastly, it helps like writing, but sometimes you need to hear it out loud to really understand what you are thinking.

Seroquel Working / Worked

It helped me sleep one month when I was so anxious that my mind wouldn't shut down like its supposed to. But it gave me the craziest dreams & night sweats ever. It also made me feel like I had a lobotomy the next morning. However, it was the only, and I mean only thing I tried that helped me sleep that month.

Support from Friends & Family Working / Worked

It works and is definitely needed but they can't be your everything. It isn't fair to them. And it sucks when they ask you if you took your pill today. When you did...you want to kill them and when you didn't...you want to kill them. Can't help it.

Writing Working / Worked

The side effects of this is my anxiety about what people would think about some of the places that my twisted mind goes to. This blogging thing is new but it kinda freaks me out. When my mom read my Winnie the Pooh diary in high school and got grounded for 6 months, I could throw it away. Blogging is forever.

Close Endometriosis

Treatments

Hysteroscopy Too Soon to Tell

I had a laparoscopy/hysteroscopy thing and this is what they found: Endometriosis spots, Endometriosis caused scar tissue holding my colon down to my rectum, a "pocket" caused by the endo, a mucus plug in one of my fallopian tubes as well as cysts of morgagni weighing them down. They cauterized/biopsied/removed everything and its all benign. We'll see whether it worked...but they sure found a lot!!

Surgery Too Soon to Tell

I had the laparoscopy to confirm endometriosis and it was there! I had surgery the day before my period was supposed to start so I had my period while also having bleeding from a D&C done for dysplasia. Currently experiencing severe and heavy bleeding & clotting 3 weeks after surgery no where near my cycle. It is intense and I know intense. I'm hoping to see my reproductive endocrinologist tomorrow.