natalie119's Journal

So my sweet grandmother started taking care of these 2 stray cats in our back yard. She loves animals and can't say no to any pair of sad eyes. However soon more cats started coming. STill, my grandma felt they just needed some love. Eventually we had about 6 cats. Now they are reproducing and we have double the amount, with various ages, colors, genders. I have to saw its gotten waaay out of control.

These cats know my grandma because she brings the foood. Whenever i try to pet them, most of them hiss or run away. NOw that we have these adorable little kittens running around, my grandma said that we need to hold them and love them while they are young so they aren't afraid of us. Its important for us to take one or two inside and get them fed, because the older cats will eat their food.

Yesterday i tried to get some kittens inside. I didn't realize that most of the cats had already been fed, so not many were out. A few older cats let me pet them and followed me. But those damn ('scuse my french) baby kittens would not let me near them, even seeing me be nice to the older cats. I stayed outside for quite some time; staying calm, moving slowly, cooing a little bit. But as soon as i got to close they would flee. 

These kitties are thin and they have no idea that i'm trying to HELP them. They don't even see how much better it would be inside an air conditioned room with food and attention. This whole seen got me thinking. The kittens reminded my of drug addicts. CALL ME CRAZY its okay. BUt hear me out. These cats were scared are skittish, and as soon as i tried to help, them they fled. Because these kittens didn't trust me. It reminded me that i cannot force these cute cats in my hand if they didn't want to. It reminded me that i can't control the drug addict. I can't force them to go to treatment. Even though i know that they can have a better life that way. I can see hesitation in the kittens eyes when i would get closer. SHould they run? hide? bite? I haven't spent enough time to get their trust. ANother realization, THIS TAKES TIME. I had to take baby steps. I need to take babysteps. Alanon is all about "one day at a time" and i understand that now more than ever.

In the end i never got a kitten inside. I grabbed one, but it was crying and yelping and the mother looked at me and started hissing. I saw the cat didn't want my help and wasn't ready. I understood that somehow. But at first i was so frustrated and so angry. I just wanted the BEST for them. BUt at the moment it is out of my control.

ANyway thats my random thought and i will certainly get back to you all later! Have a blessed day and please feel free to comment and share your thoughts on my entries, i enjoy them :)