sospeciallyme

Open Anger Management

Am hoping to find some good strategies that will help both me and my 13yo son (who has conduct disorder and ODD).

Open Breakups & Divorce

Been separated over 4 yrs now. Tried to divorce last year, but froze at last min & gave it another go. Was a disaster! Have sent away for divorce kit again and am determined to go thru w/it this time. But just feel SO weak in this process ..

Treatments

Couples Counseling Not Working

Total disaster. No cooperation from stbx. Went only a handful of times, then left. Found new counsellors this last time and he didn't even bother following through. I just let it slide then, knowing he would never go through with it and realised I didn't really want to go anyway. He never mentioned it again

Forgiveness Somewhat Helpful

I have thought at times I have forgiven him, but I don't really think I have. Still very angry, bitter and downright resentful of what I knew of my experience of 'marriage' with this guy and I just can't get past it and I guess, still can't forgive him at writing of this post

Leave Working / Worked

Well it worked in the fact that I got away from the daily living with him, but it didn't work in the fact that he still drops in at any time he wants UNANNOUNCED and UNINVITED and rings for no reason at all, which just annoys me no end. We have a son together, so I have been letting it slide for his sake, but the boundaries have to be set for this marriage to be 'put to bed', so to speak.

Love Not Working

Tried to reconcile, tried to forgive, tried to 'reignite' any feelings that may still be there .. but there was nothing left in me to give him. I have nothing 'sweet' left in my heart for him now, just nothing.

Prayer Working / Worked

I just couldn't get through without prayer!

Psychotherapy Somewhat Helpful

Am in counselling, but haven't made too much headway where my marriage is concerned

Reading Not Working

I am trying to get some resources AND ACTUALLY READ THEM, to try to get my self-esteem, strength and power back. To date, nothing has helped me much, but am still hoping.

Support from Friends & Family Somewhat Helpful

Let's face it .. people get sick of hearing the 'same old same old' when you are going through a really rough time. I think they like to nod, say the occasional 'yes I understand' and offer you a cuppa, then when you walk out the door, they thank God you've left .. lol. Actually, that's not very funny .. but true. Even if they love you, it's a big call!

Talking Working / Worked

Yes and no to this working. Yes, it gets it all out, but no .. it doesn't DEAL with things. If you are not PROactive about things, then you walk away from a venting session or whatever, straight back into the same old patterns. Talking with my stbx is a nightmare, he doesn't WANT to hear anything, then gets ANGRY when I persist, then walks out .. only to return later to apologise (which I can't accept, as he does this SO often) and act like nothing has happened. AArrgghh x 10000

Time Working / Worked

I'm just taking one day at a time at the moment and it is getting better. I can look at this now and SEE some stuff that I couldn't see at the beginning of this mongrel roller-coaster ride .. some good, some bad, some ugly .. some to do with him, some to do with me. I can only concentrate on changing me and going forward for me and my boys

Zoloft Somewhat Helpful

Am not on anything right now, as am trying to come through this on my own. But the effects weren't as helpful as what I had hoped. I got a bit (ok .. a LOT) ittitated on these too.

Prayer Working / Worked

Is an ongoing treatment and one which I would just crumble without.