slredma's Journal

Everything has been very hard on me lately. Some times I feel like I just can't keep going on like this. The pain gets worse the more active I am. My endo specialist is sending me to a pain specialist. I hope I wont have to wait more than a week. He wants them to see if they can figure out why or what is causing the pain. If they can't I have to go in for another laporascopy. He said he would have to look to see what is causing this much pain. I was in tears when I told him I shouldn't have to be in this pain every day. It's just not right. I lost my job this last year due to all this mess and I'm affraid to start another job till I figure out what is going on with me. Hopefully with the doctors help I can get back to a normal life soon. My unemployment will only last so long and looking for a job is hard. I never took any kind of pills before all this and I still fight myself every day not to take pain pills. I take Darvocet and it really doesn't help much. I still have the pain in my lower back, tail bone area and my pelvic area still hurts like mad. My specailist said I should have healed from my hysterectomy long before now so he knows its not from that. Every day I take estrogen I feel like I'm just feeding my endo but I cant top taking it. I cant function with out it. I take a higher dose and my specialist knows this as well.He does not want me to stop taking it till he finds out more about my pain. He says once it's started it wouldn't stop so it wouldn't matter at this point. There are so many questions with so little anwers. I told myself once I get my life back in order I plan on starting an endometriosis support group for my area. I tried looking for one in my area and there are none. I can't wait till tomorrow. I get to find out what pain specialist I will be going to. Hope it wont be a dead end. I'm afraid of going in for another lap.