Megan4955's Journal

Hi everyone!

Im going to try and make this short, i just thought i should give a little update here.

I spent the weekend at my moms house and it seems like everytime i go there she asks me for money. So this time i purposly did not bring any money so when she asked me i could say no and not lie (i hate lying to people:/) but when i got there what do ya know she asks me for money again! well finally i can say no but we had already decided to take my dog for a walk which ment that we had to drive up to my dads house to get him. We got there and she said she needed money for gas...well all of my money was at my dads house and she knows that so again i gave her money but she ended up spending most of it on laundry anyway! I cant help but wonder if she wants to spend time with me or she just wants to get more money from me...

Well at the end of the weekend we got into quite a big fight. She called me a spoiled brat and a few other things i dont care to repete. After awhile I got her to calm down and everything seemed fine but sudenly out of no where she just started atacking me again (verbaley) for no reason at all she just started yelling at me and critisizing me for...well just about everything. The way i stand, the way i talk, the way i look, the way i act around other people, how im an awful person for this and that. The list could keep going on for awhile but i guess I just dont see what I did to be treated like this... Anyway I have decided that I dont want to go back there again. I know when people are just "using" me because iv been treated that way a lot by many difrent people before and I dont want my mother comming near me if all she wants is my money. It was my mistake to think that she ever loved me or cared for me in anyway. Unforchanitly I have a weakness of wanting to trust people which over the years has hurt me more than helped but im thinking that this might be a good thing. Iv learned that even the most trusted loved person is capable of turning out to be the exact opisite, in a very early stage of life which i feel has prepared me a little more for the "real world".

Anyway I have pretty much decided to completly cut my mother out of my life. I might spend an evening with her once every few months but i dont desire any other form of contact with her.

Thanks for reading,

Megan(: