i have made so many good friends …
i have made so many good friends through all of this. everyone here is wonderful and supportive. i love yoyu all.
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SarahZee 
today my boyfriend's friend came over and i was making fun of him and i called him lame and i was just joking and then he said i'm i'm lame for sitting around all day doing nothing.
well of course i don't fucking do anything because i always fucking feel like shit. i keep having to try new meds and i have pmdd so i get nauseous then too. and then when i'm not feeling completely sick, i'm depressed, or dissociated, or anxious.
i shouldn't fucking have to live like this and then be JUDGED by some fucking DRUG DEALER.
i could fucking kill him right now.
i hate how i am a nice person and i have to deal with all this stupid shit that people don't even know what it is, and then assholes get to live like regular,happy people.
my psychiatrist doesn't know what's wrong with me. it's like i either have 4 personality disorders and bipolar disorder or i have schizoaffective disorder. i'm being treated for schizoaffective disorder though.
nobody knows. but i have had to deal with my brain attacking me ever since i was fucking 8 years old. and i'm a good person.
this is bullshit.
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