In 12 hours another procedure...
March 25, 2009 12:59am
Dear Reader, I'm having another RF tomorrow. SI bilateral RF lesion. I thought I was all done with this. I hate going through this damn thing. It …
sbmurphy1982
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About Me
sbmurphy1982
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Journal
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Worst Fear Realized...
March 10, 2009 1:11pm
Dear Reader, It's happening. I am being hospitalized. Being driven there right now. The pain is so bad that I can't sit up, stand, think, or see …
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Bad Week...
March 4, 2009 12:03pm
Dear Reader, Not a good week, not a good week at all. We had a snow storm here in the northeast. When there is snow, there is ice, when there …
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I look forward to meeting you...
February 27, 2009 11:25pm
Dear Reader, When I found this site today I cried. I have had back pain for almost half of my life. 13 years of debilitating pain. It has …
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thinking of you
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Good morning! I just found your profile, and although our pains are different, I completely understand about being in constant pain, especially while young. I wanted to let you know I'm here and always ready to listen! Much love, Lisa
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that is so kind of you i need that right now thanks
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Thank you, it does feel better to know someone is feeling the same way i do. Thank God for this site
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Support Groups
Close Back Pain
I've been in pain since I was 14. Teachers, friends, and family had a hard time believing that a young and healthy girl was suffering from severe back pain. One day the pain was so bad that any little movement set off hysterical crying. My dad took me to the doctor that day. My PCP discovered a small hard "patch." In my lower back, right over my sciatic joint. She sent me to specialist for further examination. The specialist spent under 5 minutes examining me. He said that the hard patch was probably a "calcium deposit" and that it would stop hurting so I should just not worry about it. So I just grit my teeth and waited. The pain fluctuated during the years until I was 19 when I felt something snap and my left leg went numb and I was in the worst pain imaginable. I was at college at the time and I couldn't get any of the doctors to take me seriously. I was called a drug addict, a hypochondriac, and a waste of time. Finally a doctor ordered an Xray just to get rid of me. The Xray revealed a 2 inch needle (that had snapped in 2) in my sciatic joint. They removed the needle and told me I would be fine. They were wrong. It took me another 4 years to find a doctor that believed I was still in pain and to diagnosis the permanent damage that the needle caused. Nerve damage, an accumulation of scarring, ligament tearing, and bulging discs. I'm only 27. I've had multiple treatments and I'm told I may always be in pain. I dream of waking up one morning and being able to say "I feel good today!"
Treatments
- Heat Not Working
- Morphine Working / Worked
- Actually OxyContin. Again... Hate being on it but the pain is just too bad.
- Oxycodone Working / Worked
- I hate being on them but nothing else touches the pain.
- Physical Therapy Too Soon to Tell
- Stretching Too Soon to Tell
- TENS Not Working
Close Depression
Type: Clinical (Major) DepressionI've suffered from clinical depression for a long time. When I was younger my mother recognized the signs and got me help. Then at 14 my mother died tragically and suddenly. I started suppressing issues, stopped therapy, and started down a path of self destruction. When I went to college I finally recognized that if I didn't get help I was going to die. I went back to therapy, got on medication for my depression, panic attacks, and got diagnosed as an insomniac. I honestly had no idea that not sleeping for days at a time was unusual, after all that's what I had done my whole life. I firmly believe that the antidepressants saved my life. My chronic back pain and problems have sent me into a downward spiral. I'm having an awful time. Surgery, multiple procedures, confined to bed for days, weeks, and even months. There have been times when people have had to dress, bathe, and help me use the bathroom. I don't feel like a woman anymore. I try not to let my demons raise there ugly heads but it is getting harder and harder. Will I ever be able to feel better, physically and mentally. Will I ever be able to sleep with my wonderful, loving fiancé? Will I ever be able to feel human. That is my only wish. I wish to feel human...
Treatments
- Celexa Working / Worked
- Psychotherapy Working / Worked
- Writing Working / Worked
Open Chronic Pain
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