Journal

I was in bed trying to go to sleep...I could not sleep and felt this urge to just go to the kitchen and eat. I argued with myself saying, "don't eat, I'm not hungry, just bored, you don't need it" But something pulled me. The craving can't be calmed, there is no talking me out of it. I had to have something un-healthy. I toasted one of my step-dad's homemade waffles (a fat one, not a thin wimpy one) and slathered it with butter, then washed it down with three chunky slices of block cheddar cheese.

This doesn't sound like much, but just an hour ago I had a large dinner (which was actually healthy, turkey burger, veggie salad, and potatos) ...then I poured myself a giant bowl of cereal (two kinds mixed together) and when I finished that I had a second monster bowl of two cereals mixed together. Then had a pack of fruit snacks after because I just wasn't satisfied. 

Why do I feel like I am never satisfied? I know I am full, I feel gross, but I just have the urge to continue eating.I keep telling myself I wll stop tomorrow, or next week, but I never do. When will it go away?

I have so much more to say I just want to save some for another day i guess. Good night.