Journal

Today is dec 5th and I am 2 weeks away from my scheduled C-section. I am so excited and scared at the same time. The thought of  having 2 in the house is both scary and exciting. I cant believe its almost over after this long year. Ihavent been on ds for a while because I have been so busy since i went back to wwork in sept. I am looking forward to maternity leave, i have one week left of work.  A lot of bad memories came back about my miscarriage back in feb. My friend had a miscarriage a few weeks ago at 15 weeks. I was so devestaed for her, it brought back so much. I couldnt even make eye contact with her, I dont understand why, I guess I just am not completly over it.

I am so angry right now. I am a school teacher in NYC and have been there for 6 years. I just got a phone call from a friend that they are movinhg my classroom across the hall from where I am alreay. That is sooooooooooooooo stupid and pointless. Now I have to go to work tommorow and tell them that I am not moving. I just started my 6th month of pregnancy, my back is killing me, I am having asthma problems, and I just dont think it is fair to move my classroom that I have been in for years when I am 6 months pregnnat, i cannot physically do it. Thats exactly what I plan on telling them tommorow. I dont need this stress right now. I know I am ranting but I needed to get my anger offf of my chest.