bluerose's Journal

Trying to find a new normal for the girls.  It's weird, almost like pretending he's not here but will walk in at anytime.  I used to think "when we split up I will leave dishes overnight in sink if i was too tired to do them." He hated dishes left in sink, i had to do them before I went to bed.  I would leave wet towels in bathroom.  Now that he's gone I do all the things the way he liked them.  I fold the clothes and towels like he did.  I used to do them different to piss him off and I can't now.  I miss him soo much.  I want to tell him how much I love him and all that mean stuff I said ,I'm sorry.  All the stuff he said to me I forgive him.  He was my world.  I feel so lost without him.