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janimal 
Hi everyone, I guess I need some venting and forgiveness of self. Sometimes I get so angry that my husband is not well. I get so tired of watching him look so miserable, having no energy, just sitting there trying to exist, listening to his moans and groans. This has been a long road for both of us. Though he is the one going through all the moment to moment stuff that I cannot imagine, I am suffering watching. My needs, my bank, tank or whatever you call it, is so empty. I miss my husband so much. How then could I possible be mean to him or say things that shoot him down when he is already so low. Sometimes I just want anything from him. A crumb of some sort. Poor man, it take all he has to get up and walk across the room. Between the loss of control of my life, that I thought I was actually in control of, and not being able to live a normal life with my beloved husband, I am actually as miserable as he. Anyway, though I know it could be so much worst, it is my life, and fortunately every day is a new day. For today, I am angry at me, really. For tomorrow,hopefully I can forgive myself and have a better attitude. Janimal
