Journal

I just read over my first journal entry here, "Pushing 200," and I am glad to say now that two months later I am down more than 15lbs. From now on, I will try not to be controlled by the numbers on the scale, but It just feels so good to know that the numbers are going down! Especially when I spend hours at the gym every week. It's nice to know that its paying off. My clothes are fitting better, some are too big, some are too small, but I'll be able to fit them soon. I am just praying that I keep the motivation, and that God gives me the strength to endure all obtsacles. Sometimes I don't feel like working out, and I don't. And sometimes I give in to the temptation to eat something that is totally unhealthy for me. For the most part I've been on the right track, though. But if I had a nutritionist and a personal trainer, I'd be at my goal in no time! Even though the weight is coming off slowly, I am very grateful, I am DEFINITELY humbled to know that this is NO cakewalk! It is not the easiest thing to do, but It isn't the hardest either, and sometimes I wish I had someone to do it with, (healthy eating/exercise), but I am also content with doing it on my own, That let's me KNOW, without a shadow of a doubt, that I can do it! I must thank God for being with me every step of the way, (It truly feels like I am in a battle for good health. And I MUST WIN.) I also am very grateful for my parents, who are supporting me (the best way that they know how, anyway). My mother keeps telling me that she is so proud of me. I love them! I have every intention to continue exercising regularly and choosing heathier foods for the rest of my life.

 I am also contemplating becoming a vegetarian (maybe not a full vegan, I would still drink milk and eat dairy products, and eggs). That is just because I get grossed out when I think of how the meat in the stores gets there. The process of killing the animals really seems cruel and I know that if I had to kill it, There would be no way I could eat it! (That was VERY RANDOM I know!)