HeLives2Day's Journal

My anger is becoming out of control and no matter what my doctor tries, it doesn't seem to work.  I can feel the anger bubbling up inside of me and it takes every ounce of energy I have to keep it in check and most days, I can't which is why I usually just stay home for fear of hurting someone.  The only person my anger is NOT directed toward (thank the LORD) is my precious son.  Somedays the anger takes over so bad I feel that I would be better off just ending things so that I won't have to live like this anymore.  However, I can't do to my son what my father did to me (i.e. my father committed suicide; however, it shot himself in front of me).  I don't want to let the anger control me so much that I won't get to see my son grow up, graduate from high school and college, get married and I want to hold my grandbabies...These thoughts help me fight the anger within!