Journal

I wouldnt trade my little family for anything in the world. It was so cool last night because some of Shannon's old highschool friends came over last night to invite us to a party. It was the greatest ever. When we got there we saw one of his friends moms and it was cool because he said this is my little family. She asked if the two boys was his and he said that they are his step-kids. He told her that their dad dont really want anything to do with them so he is pretty much daddy to them. Everyone told him that the boys look just like him. I was so excited to hear that because to me Landon my youngest does look alot like Shannon. Kobe looks just like me. The boys are leaving today to go to my parents house so we decided to let them stay up late. One of Shannons friends has a little boy who I found out is My sons friend from School. Those two played and played. We had so much fun. They have a huge swiming pool and the kids was in Heaven enjoying it. They told me that they want to go back. I told them since Shannon found his friends again, that im sure that we will be going again over there. I do love my little family so much. My guys are special. Also I have been taking care of the animals for a while now and I have been having to wear my walking shoes and they started getting ruint from getting wet. My Mother-in-law and step-father-in law went today and bought me some rubber boots so that i wouldnt have to ruin any more shoes, and they also bought me a new pair of walking shoes. I was so suprised. I told them that I have lost a total of 25lbs so far. They were impressed. I dont know why I have so much energy today. We didnt leave our friends house until 12:00am, I went to bed at 2am and got back up at 8am. I dont feel tired though. I feel like I could walk for miles. I figure I will probably get exausted later on but that is ok. My boys are going to be gone to my parents for the rest of summer. I am going to miss them so much. They love their grandparents alot and dont hardly get to see them. Im sorry Im rambling on. I just cant help myself. Well I guess Im going to get off of here and spend some quality time with them before they leave. I hope that everyone else has a wonderful day!!!!

My boyfriend told one of his friends something that has me so excited. He told his friend that we are eventually going to get married. I couldnt believe it.I know that eventually could still be a year or longer but just knowing that he does want to marry me just makes my heart feel like its going to burst.  No he doesn't know that I know and im going to keep it that way. I did however tell my mom and she was so excited. She told me to just be patient and let him do it when he is ready because it will make it that much more special. I told her that I will wait forever for Shannon because he is so special. She said after what my ex put me through, that I deserve true Happiness. I told her Thanks. She also told me that my dad told her that he likes Shannon alot. I know that all of my family likes Shannon alot except for my mom's parents. I dont know why they dont like the person who makes me happy for.  They disowned me because I was with him. It hurt me very badly because growing up they said how much my Papa loved me and that I would always be his girl. I usually am not bothered by this anymore but there are still moments that it hurts so badly. I was always extremly close to them. Shannon never did anything wrong. He loves me and my boys, well our boys because they see him as a dad. When shannon does propose, I am going to send them an invitation to my wedding and then it will be in their hands if they come or not. I do love Shannon and want to spend the rest of my life with him. Please Pray that my grandparents will come around. They saw what my ex husband put me through when he left me and the boys. To be honest I dont care for my ex husband because the way that he does the boys now, but I dont hate him. Im greatful to him for leaving. He is now married again and I do hope and pray that him and his new wife can make a go of it forever. I had plenty of time to find myself before I met Shannon. I am glad that I did. Yes I gained alot of weight because I was so depressed and I did try to make my marriage work with my ex. He came crawling back and I told him that for us to make our marriage work that we would need to go to counciling, because I just couldnt trust him anymore. He refused saying that its no ones business but ours. I told him Im sorry but If your not willing to work on it then we have nothing left. He told me that I would never find anyone. I proved him wrong. It was almost a year later when I met Shannon. Kevin Left Sept 2006 when my youngest was just 15months, I got my divorcee in April 2007 and met Shannon August 4th, 2007. I didnt date anyone until after my divorcee because regardless of what my ex did, I did take my vows seriously. I dated a few guys before I met Shannon but none of them was right for me. It was weird but I had said whoever my youngest child would go to would be the one for me because he was a very shy baby and didnt go to strangers. On August 4th, 2007 we was at a park with Shannon and poor Landon fell and bloodied his nose. He of course came running to me. I asked Shannon if he would mind holding landon and he held him and Landon laid his little head on Shannons shoulder and got blood all over Shannons shirt. I appologized and wanted to cry because I just knew there was no way that a single guy with no kids would want a plus size woman with two kids and have to deal with bloody noses and all the things that come with raising kids. He told me it was no big deal and that the blood would wash out. Sure enough he still has that same shirt now and there is no blood stains on it at all. When he told me that about it being no big deal my heart was his. He was the kind of guy I was looking for. Our first date lasted 23hours. He gave me a kiss that just blew me a way. I for some reason asked him if he would be willing to meet my parents and he said yes. I drove a couple of hours to take him to meet my parents. He is the first guy I ever brought home to meet my parents since my ex husband. He is just such a special person. I cant help being excited about spending the rest of my life with him. Whenever he does come around and proposes, I will definetly write a Journal entry and let everyone know. Well im sorry this is so long but I am just so excited and just had to pour my heart out. Like I said I feel like my heart is going to burst from the love that I feel for him. He is Amazing. Well I hope that everyone else had a wonderful day as well. God Bless