Moved alot! don't understand the concept of home. Went to 3 different schools in my 7th grade year, and 12 different schools grwing up. Always the new kid trying to survive. Sexually, physically, and mentally abused by many. Very protective of other people, i can stand up for them, but not myself. Have very few relatives left! All uncle's died. Suicide, disease, old age, etc. 2 out of 4 aunts still alive. 3 out 4 granparents died. Grandmother committed suicide, the other 2 old age. 1 grandparent left that i actually just met 2 mos. ago. My mother is complicated and unreliable, but my dad is awesome! He's my everything!!!!! Don't really talk to my siblings much. My brother stopped talking to me 6 yrs ago. Used to be really close, no explaination, just stopped calling. Miss him like crazy and plan on trying to reconnect with him this next year!!!Fingers crossed! Had a wicked stepmother, controling, obsessive, attention seeker, etc. contributed to a horrible childhood! But beleive it or not, we actually get along now! Go figure! I'm in a, to put it politely, not so great marriage. Alot of issues there! Read my first journal entry and that will help some that up!!! I want to travel, but can't, trying to get back into my dancing and my photography. Spend each day choosing to wake up and breathe!!!
Moved alot! don't understand the concept of home. Went to 3 different schools in my 7th grade year, and 12 different schools grwing up. Always the new kid trying to survive. Sexually, physically, and mentally abused by many. Very protective of other people, i can stand up for them, but not myself. Have very few relatives left! All uncle's died. Suicide, disease, old age, etc. 2 out of 4 aunts still alive. 3 out 4 granparents died. Grandmother committed suicide, the other 2 old age. 1 grandparent
Dancing, (anykind, but more specifically, Latin Ballroom and Contemperary), playing guitar, singing sewing, hiking, live theatre, photography, scrapbooking, writing poetry and short stories, doing digital art, spending time with my neices and nephews!!!Helping people!
Dancing, (anykind, but more specifically, Latin Ballroom and Contemperary), playing guitar, singing sewing,
April 23, 2009 2:54am
So i sit here tonight feeling alone once again.
I know everyone's got problems, but i feel so overloaded. I know tomorrows going to be …
January 22, 2009 3:50am
So i'm trying so hard to be strong today and yet i feel sick to my stomach. I don't usually keep track of death dates, but for dome reason …
January 17, 2009 4:27pm
I meant to write about this like a week ago cuz i told a friend i would,but time got away from me! But it's never to late i say.
So i was …
Miss you my partner in crime, this place aint the same without you, worry about you, miss you, hope your out there somewhere, i miss you. i will become a steelers fan if you come back.......love, shaz...
Its been over 5 months now, still miss you soooooo much, hope you are ok and safe, thats the main thing, miss you.....
missssssss youuuuuuuu, there is even an emotion for you not being on..........its been over 4 months......
me miss youuuuuuu, come back, I will be a steelers fan for a week....gooooooo r......berger lol.......
missssssssssss youuuuuuu
Sexually abused by sister and brother amognst many others.
Doing better, but deal with social anxiety/ panic attacks
always dealt with depression. Bad childhood, stress, marriage troubles, etc.
Used to cut as a child until 14 yrs. old then finally got a handle on it until age 25 then started again.
Self explanitory!!!
It started about 6 months ago and i was actually able to fix it for a little while,or so i thought and now it's just out of control!
My Grandmother took a ton of pills,but didn't die right away like she thought. It was very painful and she ended up foaming at the mouth and having seizures until her body finally gave out. My Uncle took a shotgun to his work and went to his office and blew his head off. My stepdad made himself overdose on Heroine.
My weight fluctuates all the time.It drives me crazy! I'm one of those,you eat a crumb and gain 5 pounds!
