Why is it that I see so many people …
Why is it that I see so many people who can't do their job well and I know that I can do it so much better, but …
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Melinn 
3:21am, January 5, 2009
Summer is dragging. I really hate the hot weather, so glad it's supposed to rain today. Kids are crazy hyper. I keep them busy with playground, library and museums, but they still wrestle and tease each other at the end of the day. I am exhausted, why don't they just sit and rest? Instead they yell, whine, and beg for my attention. My oldest is addicted to video game, thanks to my hubby. I can feel all his brain cells dying right in front of me. Some days, I wish I could just go to work fulltime at a wonderful job with wonderful coworkers and have wonderful babysitters for the kids. That is an utter fantasy. More likely I will suffer in depression, stress, divorce and die from Lupus in a few years. I know, I need to work on being less negative. I don't even write online as much. The marriage forum I was loyal to, has too many sad people cheating and getting divorce. I need a place with people that are successful and happy. I already surrounded myself and commisurated enough with people with similar problems. I need to step up somehow. I need a new phase in my life.
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The summer here is dragging as well, I live in Massachusetts, where it's rained the past 12 out of 14 days, and there's no sign of the rain letting up. I've been trying to keep busy though, which is what sounds to me like you're doing. The kids having their brain cells depleted by video games is a sad thing, why not try to introduce him to hockey or something else that is fun and a full workout? Explain to him that all he's looking at are ones and zeros being orgainzed through your tv, and that the hunk of plastic and metal is doing nothing to better his future. Try to downplay the video games, to help him see that really, video games are not all that important and are considered by many to be a waste of time.
And as for surrounding yourself with positive people, I totally agree with you, you should defitently do that. I consider myself to be a positive person, though I do have my days when my depression breaks through. I go to school, I volunteer, I do whatever it takes to fight the depression. There's definetly hope for you, you just can't ever give up.
pointofthought