Well! A "DougHug". Thanks so much! …
Well! A "DougHug". Thanks so much! My son is twelve, and was officially diagnosed with P.D.D./N.O.S.; I think of it …
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JuniorsGirl 
2:22pm Tuesday
Well...shot #4 is done. It seems to me like the sides are getting worse. I walked into the bathroom at his moms to check on him and he was sitting on the floor not feeling too hot. He had the metallic taste for the first time last night too. I am going to pray we have a turn around and the sides start going away! I'm at work (story of my life) but hopefully Gabe will let him sleep a bit. We seem to be at each others throats lately. If I snap at him because I am tired, its the end of the world...but if he snaps at me its supposed to be ok? I am trying to be understanding and I know this has to be hard on him. I just feel like everything is my fault lately and I know I am working my ass off to help. I am now working not 1 but 3 jobs...AND I cut hair on the side. 7 days a week. I dont need anyone to feel sorry for me, but dammit I am freaking exhausted!! I come home from work and have to work some more on the house. Dishes aren't done...what are we having for dinner...and on and on. Its not that I am not willing to do it, but for 1 day I would like to not have to do any of it. I need a vacation. Maybe I'm on my own little pity party, but here I am on a beautiful Saturday morning....at work. Sorry to bitch and moan, but sometimes I just want to lay my head down and cry...I think this is a better alternative.
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Well, I think I put my husband through the same thing, JG. Sorry, you are going through this. I told my husband just to live life as normal as he could, because that helps me. Please understand, that whatever he says to you, it IS the meds talking. This shit can really take over your emotions and change you while on tx....please try not to take it personal. It's him. Not you. YOu are doing what you can. Maybe you could have a girls night out, every once in awhile?
Buy paper plates and all that. It helps. You still have a life to live, and it's not all about hiim, even on tx.
He can still take care of himself, hon. Don't feel like you have to be his caretaker. You keep on living, and try to find some fun and get out. Can you join a knit and bitch in your town?
Hang in there, and I'm here for you when you need to vent.
rbm
I think the side come out in the first 2 mnths then ease up a little. For me anyway, the 'brain' stuff was worst from about 4 to 6 wks........ It is tough. My house does not get cleaned like it should, but I doesn't matter any more!
I have made some easy casseroles lately, then he always has something to eat when he comes home,,,,,,,,,,,, but you know, he won't starve, he can get food!
RBM gave excellent advice, don't put yourself on the back burner.
It will all work out in the end...................
jkbearhug
Thank you both. I'm going to go take a nap.
JuniorsGirl
I know you are working hard.I know how you are trying to make things easy for me and help. You have to understand that I am trying to. I am on tx, yes, but I am not helpless. I am trying to do the best that I can. I am sorry if I snap at you. Sometimes I dont realize I am doing it until its to late. I'm sorry. You know as well as I do, I am not like this. Some strange things are going on in my head and I am trying my best to deal with them as best as I can. Please understand that. You know, for being on treatment I am doing pretty well as work, especially pulling my regular 40hrs a wekk AND at least 15 hours of OT. I am tired of being stressed about money and Most of mine is giong to this treatment and meds. It really suck to work so hard just to have money and then have HCV take it away. I cant sleep very well, my appetite is starting to fade and I am gettting crankier and crankier. It's not you baby. It's me. I see how hard you are working, how much you are doing around the house, and how mush you are trying to help me out. It does not go unnoticed. This last shot was a bitch and I am trying my best to put the sides in the back of my mind and carry on like nothing is happening. It's just really hard. I am scared; for me , for you, for US. I am going to kick this damnable disease right in its ass! Just you wait. In the meantime please knw that I love you dearly and appreciate everything that you are doing. It's only going to get better. IT HAS TO! WE WILL WIN! This dragons life is numbered.
I love you.
TulsaJunior