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BeStill 
2:39am, February 13, 2009
My husband came back after one night out. We still haven't spoken to one another and he is sleeping in the spare room. The good news is that tension is low and there seems to be an understanding that we both just need space. The problem is that I have really gone into a hyperactive/vigilant state and am worried that I will eventually crash when he comes back around. Perhaps I should be looking on the bright side because I am actually doing OK. I am functioning and able to be there for me kids. My kids seem to be doing really well too, so thank GOd for that. As great as my husband can be, he has his issues to and they really trigger me. He has a temper and sometimes the whole "walking on eggshells" thing happens in our house. He is either or. Black or white hot or cold. The times when he is really wonderful seem to outweigh the times that he is not, but it is REALLY hard. I had a psych. Doc. tell me that he didn't think I would get better unless I wasn't wikth him any,more because of how much he triggers me. We have both done alot of healing together and I don't want to throw that out the window. I just hope we don't get stuck in a cycle that lasts our lifetime. I am all about BREAKING the CYLE!! Thanks to everyone who has supported. I really appreciate your words Aurenna.
Comments
Sometimes it feels overwhelming when you have to deal with the PTSD and other people. Right now I have a strong desire to find s cabin in the woods and not have to deal with anyone else. Just a delightful dream. I'm glad your Husband came back. What I am finding out, is as you start healing, your relationship will go through many changes. I hope your Husband has the strength and respect for you to change with you. This is a very rough time, BUT don't give up on yourself. You need to do this for you. Your family will benifit from it too. Keeping you in my thoughts. Hugs!!
Aurenna
Is good to hear you are doing ok, all things considering,I agree Aurenna is great, her words are always helpful......
amiko
Maybe your husband has Depression or Irritable Male Syndrome. His irritability might be helped by a mood stablizing med like Depakote.
Men experience depression a bit different than women.
My hubby was really irritable, and Depakote has done wonders for him!!
Hang in there...If you're used to those "up" times, and then know there's a 'Crash' coming soon...it probably will occur. It might be good to track your moods. Google Bipolar Mood Chart or something like that to get a form of a mood chart. I had 1 week a month where I was 'up', then the 'crash.' Now, it's gone...b/c of meds, I miss that upswing.
HUGS!
TLCDaisy
Glad to hear he is back.
My therapist told me I have to leave and I did. My x is not a treatable case though.
If your hubby is black and white, he might have BPD which is treatable. And yes BPD stuff will trigger. I dated a BPD guy and he triggered me very badly. I think its cuz we had so many similar issues. I am still BPD and fixing it bit by bit.
I wish you best,
Keep us posted.
K
Kath08