Rebbecca's Journal

So, I want to start this entry off with…I love my Doctor. I know how often we hate Doctors; I hate them quite a bit, most of the time. They rarely listen to a word we say, they think they know it all, and they don’t really help a whole lot. But, my Doctor? He rocks.

It took a pretty long time to find him. When I first met him, I was extremely relieved, like a weight had been taken from my shoulders. A little bit of the frustration could be comforted. He listened to what I told him, took step by step all of my health issues, and addressed them, one by one. My chronic pain has always been the worst. I take so many meds a day I feel sick, which, I’m pretty sure, isn’t what meds are supposed to do.

As my journal shows, I fell on December 14th. I was in a lot of pain from an already torn meniscus, and falling on it certainly didn’t help.

I went to the ER last Saturday and got a script for Vicodin (I was hoping for Percocet, but it’s too “controlled”). Either way, I needed some pain relief. They gave me some Vicodin and said to see my Doctor on Monday. Well, I already had a Dr’s appt on Tuesday scheduled, so I just waited for then. When I went in, it was originally a follow-up for the Strattera I was taking (which didn’t do anything that I could tell). I told him I fell and that I needed a referral for an orthopedist so I could finally get the surgery I’ve been putting off. I also told him I needed pain meds and about DS (he’s really open and friendly and has guided me to some really cool books in the past). He wrote down the website to look at later and asked how many pain meds I needed. I told him as many as it would take to tide me over to surgery, and that, if possible, Percocet works best for me. I have taken Percocet before and I know it works. I know how the other major pain meds make me feel. And what did he do? Did he tell me it is too controlled or he suggests something else? No. He wrote out a script and said to try to keep off my knee. Seriously. He wrote a script for *100* Percocet (the pharmacy had to call to verify, get special authorization, and took a little longer to get it for me). The bottle hadn’t even been opened, it’s the size of a vitamin bottle! I love my Doctor, did I mention that?

He trusted me. That’s huge for me and Drs. He and I have talked about everything and I have been as honest as possible. He knows whether I could become an addict, and he trusted me to take care of myself, no questions asked. He hugged me on my way out and made sure I had my referral. He also got very frustrated when I told him how most Drs are/have been and how I was treated in the Urgent Care/ER.

As for how I feel now? I feel better than I have in a long, long time. If how I feel on Percocet (or any pain med that works) is a sign of why I am constantly grumpy, tired, irritable, impatient, depressed, etc…then I know for certain it is the chronic pain. How I long to be without it on a more permanent basis, and without the need for drugs. In the meantime, I’m eternally grateful for my patient, considerate, *real* Doctor.