Journal

OMG I hate my life right now all I feel is nothing all I do is cry I just want to hurt myself so bad I hate this... I am suppose to be enjoying being pregnant but how can I with them??

I don't feel like I am home I want to be home with my mum, dad and my brother.. I feel so alone and like every fucker here gangs up on me about shit I can't be arsed with it all with them either. moving into this house was a complete mistake.

I just don't know what to do anymore..

I think I need to see someone about all this it can't be doing the baby any good =(

It's not my fault I move in my sleep, my partner had ago at me for kicking him in my sleep when I didn't mean to it was a complete accident I can't control my body when I am asleep. I told him I am not apoligising for something that isn't my fault because it's not. Then he still carrys on ignoring me and playing petty little games on his laptop and not showing me any care or attention...

I AM FUCKING PREGNANT!!!!

What does it take to just get someone to show me they care?

I feel alone and that I am doing everything by myself!!! This is not how it should be.

I have told him this before but it just doesn't seem to register or then he twists the story around so I look like I am not being good enough. I think this time I am just going to lock it away I am tired of trying to gt things through to him.

I woke up today to being alone in the house and I feel like shite, basically my fella can make time for others but not for me I feel like he doesn't care how I feel, I am getting to the point where I am actually feeling depressed and lonely. I would talk to him about this but I know he just won't listen when does he ever I have gone on and on about this shit before and he doesn't do nothing. So why waste my breath?

AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!

AM I GOING TO GO THROUGH THIS PREGNANCY ALONE OR IS HE GOING TO STEP UP???