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Give Lindaheff a Hug

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  Ray of Sunshine
  

  IUPUI (10/08/09)

  Hi Linda, It is very cold and rainy here so I'm sending you some sunshine. I don't know if this rain is heading your way. I am actually having a hard time staying warm - it's a real harbinger of winter today. I'm fighting hard to keep my blood counts up. I really need to go to the library and get something to read but I can't manage the cold. Pretty bad when the library is only 5 blocks away :( I hope all is well in NJ. Much love, Janet
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  Ray of Sunshine
  

  buttany1 (10/05/09)

  Hello Linda. My CA 125 is up 4 this draw and I was told not to worry as other things besides cancer can make it rise a bit. But I know when I first saw it I was in a panic. Damn this disease and what it has done to us. Super sized hugs to you! Have you been on any fun sailing trips? My running is at a stand still right now. Injuried my heel so I am letting it heal. But will be back at it soon. More big hugs! Beth
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  Superhero Status
  

  IUPUI (10/05/09)

  Hi Linda, I really think a rise of 2 points is probably within the margin of error; but I do know the frustration and powerlessness we can feel about these results. I do wonder why we are not living the lives our parents did. I wish I knew why I got this disease but I imagine it is somewhat related to my brother's colon cancer. He was younger and died at age 51. I will keep hoping and praying that your numbers keep going down. I do get envious of people who have long remissions. I guess, though, that we have to fight our own battles. You are a fighter and will not give up - I'm sure of that. I know the new baby will also give you strength. Much love, Janet
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  Ray of Sunshine
  

  IUPUI (10/05/09)

  Hi Linda, I'm finally not so extremely tired as I've been the past 48 hours. It is a beautiful day here but is supposed to get cooler and rain tomorrow. I am home today but will probably go to work part of tomorrow. I slept very well last night for some reason but it sure does make one feel much better. My CA 125 is now down to 16 - not the dramatic drop of the month before but at least it is normal and the doctor is happy.
  
  We are waiting for one more grandchild due 11/16/09. This is my daughter in San Francisco. I hope she is able to get the h1n1 flu shot. She also has asthma but seems to be doing well with the pregnancy. My son's new baby has his one month check up today. We talk to them on Skype and he just looks so big. I'm really curious about his weight now. The other grandma has gone back to Italy so they are one their own. We are planning to go to Chicago in a couple of weeks to meet the little guy. I hope all is well. Keep warm and much love, Janet
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  Hug
  

  tinynae (10/04/09)

  Hi Linda, I don't know to much about the CA levels, seeming how I was never given one till after the tumor was removed. But hopefully yours rising doesn't mean anything bad, I know they can fluctuate a little, so hopefully that is all they are doing. So you got a flu shot with the chemo too…it’s not very fun, I think it makes you feel even more yucky. I am doing ok, I’m just very tired lately and feeling a little glumy, and my rash is lightening up slowly. Just got to get used to all of this. I guess now more then ever it’s important to take one day at a time! Take care… Lots of hugs!! ~Renee
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  Hug
  

  tinynae (10/04/09)

  Hi Linda, I hope you've had a great weekend so far. It's rainy and cold here..yuck. I guess it truly is fall! At least it's starting to look pretty. I'm so excited to hear you will be having a new addition to your family!!! That is so precious! I hope all is well with you, lot's of hugs ~Renee
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  Hug
  

  lindamae (10/03/09)

  Hi Linda,
  I guess what you have is a very complicated and unhealthy relationshi with your Mom. . Much like I had over most of my lifetime with my mother. Now, that she is shrinking away to nothing she seems to have lost any power over me that I felt before. I can now see the good times...and that surely is a gift I never imagined to have. Rhoda, who is a DS also has this kind of terrible situation w/ her Mom. And Inka had dismal memories of her own mother who is now dead. How many of us, I wonder get this double whammy!
  Perhaps your husband is correct about it not being good for your health. Sounds like a pattern that your mother rather "enjoys" which is terribly sad...but a reality.
  I hope you can get some resolution...but that may or may not be in the cards...who knows?
  I am sick today with a dang cold. Have been trying to pretend it's not there, but this morning with my poor nose all crusty and my head stuffed up...had to give in.
  Took a pain pill to see if it can get me through the morning (yikes, it's afternoon!) with something concrete done. I have to let my friends dogs out...and am I bit nervous as their German Shepherd really seems to dislike me. I grew up with Shepherds so being afraid is not my usual m.o. with this breed.. I am taking over some dog biscuits to see if we can make friends.
  Other than this not much to do. Tomorrow I plan to take my "over-sized" clothes to Coldwater Creek to return them. Guess I will walk around the shopping area. Wish my daughter was here...we like doing window shopping together.
  Mackie has found a home that he was going to put a bid on today...it turns out not to be a condo but a small home in a golfing community. My SIL felt it was a good choice and she has known me since I was 12! Mac loves to golf...I prefer miniature golf as it only takes a short time. Would rather read or do artwork than walk around the golf course. But think that Mac would really enjoy this! Even if I was to die soon, he'd have a nice spot where he will make lots of friends.
  well, that's my news. I had a better visit with my mother yesterday. Got a big hug from one of the staff. The women who work with mother are truly amazing. I call them her "angels." many hugs and good thoughts coming your way! lindamae
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  Congrats
  

  IUPUI (10/03/09)

  More congratulations about the baby. My sons were born on May 2 and 11. Wonderful days for birthdays. They didn't make me have a flu shot but I will get a free one at work next week if supplies last. Love, Janet
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  Flowers
  

  IUPUI (10/03/09)

  Hi Linda, May is a wonderful time to have a baby. My first and fourth sons were born in May as was my olderst grandson. Among other things it's a good occasion to buy summer gifts and clothes. Hopefully your daughter will be able to manage most of her teaching obligations before the baby comes. My daughter is due with her second on November 16 in San Francisco. I have decided to go out there despite being in active chemo. She just wanted me there and I decided that if I could I will do the things important in my life. I'm not going to be in such great shape to help out with things but I think I should be albe to read to her two year, Sabine. Sabine is an amazingly verbal child especially since she won't be 2 until November 3. I was supposed to go and visit her November 15, 2007 but was hospitalized and got diagnosed with ovca November 14 and remained in continuous care until April 2008. I'm glad that your daughter is nearby. It should be fun for you to watch the baby grow. Much love, Janet
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  Hug
  

  IUPUI (10/02/09)

  Dear Linda, I'm adding this hug and can see Lindamae's hug right below. Do you have exciting news about a grandchild!!? How wonderful. I know you were not expecting it to ever happen when we first met. Will this be your daughter's child. It's nice to have happy goals to invade and occupy our minds. When is the due date? Chemo today went very well. I start at 7:30 with the infusions and get something continuously until after 3:00; however this time was over an hour less than last cycle. My red blood cells and hematocrit are below normal despite the iron in my diet and despite me feeling better this round. Perhaps I've just adapted to the lower values and my body is compensating. Right now I feel okay except a little drugged from the benedryl. It did clear my sinuses however :) Much love, Janet

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