SoMindful's Journal

10/20/08

I can't deal with it anymore.

No matter what I do

How hard I try.

It's never enough.

I've done my best

and I thought that was good enough

But I'm constantly reminded 

of my mistakes.

By people who supposedly love me.

Though I may move on

It will never happen for them

They don't see the effort i've put forth

Because it isn't all typical.

I've changed my mind.

Allowed God into my soul.

Gotten up when I fel like giving up.

Go ahead and yell at me.

Your words can no longerhurt me.

I need not to rely on you anymore

But I thank you for being with me at my worst.

But just no longer can stay in the vicinity

For my own well-being

If I fall I do not expect you to catch me

I will just wipe off  the dirt

from my hands and knees.

And try again

I will allow myself chances.

Expect progress.

And love being my own rock.

It is time for me to try my hand 

at independence again

And now I am mentally prepared for it.

I'm strong enough.

And my happiness will be obtained 

through myself.

For myself is much more capable than you think.