Journal

feel a bit better tonite,ativan has made me tired,going to take half dose of seroquel tonite,whoile dose makes me too groggy in the morning. thanks for all the notes of hope,i appreciate it.

i am off to a crappy start. coworker called in sick,how convenient. boss started off late and went to dr appt,havent seen him. mood spiraling back down. tried to remain upbeat earlier this morning but went back to bed for awhile,didnt do dishes or clean.hate to have to keep putting on a happy face to hubby,wish i  could leave for jersey shore.

Life is Good. I am only taking less than 50% of the cymbalta and seroquel I should,but managed to muster through PMS this past week without drinking or cutting or any of the negative impulsive things I ordinary do. Actually getting excited about b-day/anniv next week,hubbys gift was to arrive today,hope it did. Have l gift allready and a 3rd on order. Have to think of a special anniversary dinner to cook next week. Best part,I get to share my day off the 24th with my husband in the morning,my therapist at noon,then back home to hubby! Best of both worlds. Felt guilty because my best friend had to walk the 6 miles or some home yesterday,but I couldnt leave work in the middle of day to give her a ride and I couldnt just give her a ride after work. With price of gas and what not,if she walks the 6 miles down here she can just walk the 6 miles back. Will try to drop off water to her tomorrow nite when I am in town to visit mom at the nursing home. Got mom a new phone, hope she likes "hello kitty" it is cute,not that she can see it that well hope the cord works. If not,I have red princess on order for next week. Trying to stay upbeat. Finally sinking into my thick skull that I have to keep working at this mood thing.