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justgirl 
Hi everyone, hope you all are having a good weekend. Been kind of rough for me this week. A special person in my life passed away last Thursday. I been talking to him while he has been in the hospital since January 24th.
He is my first real love. We were kids, I was 17 and he was 19. We were engaged to be married, yes it was young. But we loved each other. He was in collage and I was still in highschool. towards his graduation he started not coming over much (was a long distance relationship, him in Indiana and me in Michigan). I took it as he found someone else. But years later found out it was because he was busy finding a job, a place for us to live student loans were coming in and he couldn't pay for alot of phone calls like he used to or gas to drive all the way to visit and was to proud to admit it. Plus the fact his last visit my father found out I skipped school to be with him at a hotel. Yeah I was young, but was in love and had a ring on my finger so didn't feel it was a sin. However dad thought it different, I was his baby girl. He was so angry, it scared David (my love) in coming back for another visit to soon. It is to bad we were so young and lack of communication skills we didn't talk about it more. If we had internet it would have been different I think. We would have been able to share more without huge phone bills and work threw it. Instead I told him I took the ring off. I waited for him to ask why, he never did. He loved me so much and thought I found someone else and didn't want to stand in my way of happieness. Again, we were young, so very young. He never found another, and at the time I didn't have another either.
Years later we found each other threw classmates. We talked online for hours that first day, then from then on. Alot of closure and tears. It was to late for us, I been married 25 years this June. He wanted me back but knew it was to late. But continue to talk. Even when he was in the hospital with a trache. Unable to walk or talk, he could still message me on yahoo. His last message was "I love you babe, always remember that". I found out when his sister called me he passed away short time later.
Hug your loved ones tight and tell them you love them. Love and hugs, Mary
Comments
I am so sorry for your loss and the pain you are feeling. Oh to be young again sometimes. Honey, you are in my prayers and I'm here if you need to talk. Love you.
violeti
Oh Mary, How sad for you. In a way you had been grieving that relationship over these last years. It was like unfinished business. There is just something about a first love, for you it was even a deeper relationship because you was engaged. I am glad that after all of these years, that you found out he wasn't just dumping you and he found out the same about you. Allow yourself to grieve. You evidently were not suppose to be together but the strong bond that you both shared, stayed as a fragrance of that "first love," in your hearts. I will be praying for you. Grace to you..B
Grace90
My heart aches for you. I can feel your sadness in your journal. That totally sucks. Plain and simple. I'm sorry.
Jenn820