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BabyBluEyzzz 
9:48pm, November 17, 2009
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About Me
BabyBluEyzzz
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About Me
to be continued............
to be continued............
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Recent Activity
Recently:
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2 hugs received, 1 hug given
Thursday
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BabyBluEyzzz gave mildred71 a sympathy 12:28pm
I hope you have ppl in your life that love and appreciate you. Seems like some of us were born with a…
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BabyBluEyzzz and FieryRedHead are now friends 12:10pm
November 18
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BabyBluEyzzz and catwoman2 are now friends 7:23pm
November 17
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BabyBluEyzzz and MyTrueColors are now friends 11:45pm
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BabyBluEyzzz and Livndadrem are now friends 11:15pm
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BabyBluEyzzz hasn’t written any journal entries yet. -
Hugbook
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Flower
Just thinking about you today....hope everything is getting better.
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Chocolate
Wish it was a bigger piece! I'm sorry that you are confused, I wish there was something I could do to help. Just know that you have friends here that are more than willing to give you the support and help that you need.
Ray of Sunshine
Thx. I'm very confused and have no friends or family I can talk to.
Hi BabyBluE,
Thanks for your response. You are going through such a hard time right now.
Are things any better? Have the two of you talked about this?
I was in an emotionally abusive relationship for 22 years, and there were a lot of impossible things about it. But the main thing that dragged me down was the confusion. I got such mixed messages- about what I did, what I wanted, who I was to him, my value as a person.
One of my survival tools- which I think you'll want to start collecting for yourself- was to assume that what he said about me was untrue. It's a long, long story and I won't be able to tell it here. But I found ways to shut the craziness out. I started building new communities that knew nothing about him and in which I was safe- like church. They liked me based on who I was- I started to see that it was HIS opinion that was skewed.
I know about the wedding, but I don't know anything else about your situation. Google 'emotional abuse symptoms' and see whether they apply. You can get free appointments at women's shelters to find out what it is, and where there might be local support groups.
These are the things that I suggest looking at:
How good are things on a normal basis with this man?
Does he view me as an equal?
Are our feelings for each other mutual, or is it unevenly balanced?
Am I more invested in our relationship together than I am to my relationship with myself?
Is this relationship a sane and healthy one?-- sometimes it helps to imagine a strong, stable person that you admire in relationship with this man: what would they think of him? Would they find the relationship one that made them a stronger, healthier person?
DrPhil.com also has some very useful articles about this stuff. I googled like crazy when I was in mine.
Therapy, if you can afford it, is incredibly helpful. Just saying some of these things in your out-loud voice helps to clarify things. It's amazing.
Journal. Pray. Get out of the house.
And breathe. It will be alright. But it's funny- life often solves things with us in different ways than we would have imagined.
I'll sign off, but I leave you with one more thought:
Imagine yourself as a healthy, vibrant 80 year old woman who is content with her life. Look back at this time from your old age. What do you see? Who is this young woman? And who is she 15 years later? What does her life look like then?
And how did she get there?
There is help, Baby. You aren't quite as alone as you think.
You *will* be that beautiful, confident old woman one day. Walk toward her. Become who you want to be.
Ultimately it is about recognizing who you want to be, and then taking one small step. And then another. And then walking into the happier, safer future.
You are in my thoughts and heart.
Cecilia xoxox-
Hug
Hi Baby,
I'm thinking about you today and wrapping my arms around you.
In my heart I'm making you cocoa and cookies.
You are valuable.
love, Cecilia -
Chocolate
Read through your post on self esteem....looks like you could use something to cheer you up. Have a piece of chocolate. :) I hope things get better for you...hang in there.
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Support Groups
Close Codependency
I've been in a relationship for nearly 4 years now and have only just begun to realize that it very well could be a codependent relationship. Looking back at past relationships this might be true in some way of all/ some of them.
Close Celiac Disease
I was diagnosed with Celiac Disease about 7 years ago. When I was first diagnosed I had no support system so I started a group in my area. I also helped a nutritionist write a book about the GF lifestyle. It's been sometime now since I have been active in any group in any way and I am interested to learn what's new with the research into Celiac Disease and GF Foods.
Treatments
- Avoid Certain Foods / Chemicals Working / Worked
- Gluten Free Diet Working / Worked
Open Psoriasis
Affected Areas: Psoriasis of the SkinI have severe Psoriatic Arthritis. At this moment I am relatively clear of psoriasis but the arthritis seems to be spreading
Treatments
- Betamethasone (Topical) Not Working
- Methotrexate Somewhat Helpful
- Taclonex Somewhat Helpful
- Humira Not Working
Open Physical & Emotional Abuse
I am beginning to realize I am in an emotionally abusive relationship.
