Journal

I feel like my body is a battle ground. Will I cut today, will I over eat, once I start I cant stop. I feel like shit when I cut, like its a guilty pleasure, I feel even worse when I Over eat, I feel Like I want to die. I hate this fight, I have it every day. Suicide seems so much easier, but I  know its not the answer. Why is everything so difficult, mabey they need to be medicated more. If I dont do either of those I'm hitting the bottle. I hate this, I hate this life, and I hate feel so alone.