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  From dennist June 17

  A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.
  "Mom" , he asked , "Are these my brains?"
  "Not yet , " she replied.

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  From dennist May 20

  hope your ok havent heard from you in awhile drop a line to let me know how youve been when you can

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  From dennist May 19

  A very tired nurse walks into a bank, Totally exhausted after an 18-hour shift. Preparing to write a check, She pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse And tries to write with it. When she realizes her mistake, She looks at the flabbergasted teller And without missing a beat, she says: 'Well, that's great....that's just great... Some asshole's got my pen!'

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  From dennist April 7

  Childbirth at 65 With all the new technology regarding fertility recently, a 65-year-old friend of mine was able to give birth. When she was discharged from the hospital and went home, I went to visit. 'May I see the new baby?' I asked 'Not yet,' She said 'I'll make coffee and we can visit for a while first.' Thirty minutes had passed, and I asked, 'May I see the new baby now?' 'No, not yet,' She said.. After another few minutes had elapsed, I asked again, 'May I see the baby now?' 'No, not yet,' replied my friend. Growing very impatient, I asked, 'Well, when can I see the baby?' 'WHEN HE CRIES!' she told me. 'WHEN HE CRIES?' I demanded. 'Why do I have to wait until he CRIES?' 'BECAUSE I FORGOT WHERE I PUT HIM, O.K.?!!'

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  From kitty41 March 26

  If I call you friend, You will always share a piece of my heart. I will always pride myself, To always be true to you. As much as I need friends, So must you. I will also share a place in your heart, To be there whenever you need me. I may not be there in flesh, But I will always be there in spirit. I will cope with your moods, And try to understand your needs. When you are angry, I will laugh with you. As sadness overwhelms you, We will cry together. If you feel down and kicked, I will pick you up and brush away your doubts. When you think you can't continue, I will remind you that you can. As you become discouraged, I will boost your ego high. At times when you wish to talk, My attention will all be yours. Being a friend I don't take lightly, It's my desire, never a chore. At times when you must mourn, I shall mourn with you. If you need some silence, yet not be alone, We will sit together in the peace of quiet. When you wish to play, You will always have a playmate. When you feel on top of the world, I'll pat your back and tell you, you deserve to be. You will never be completely alone, A piece of me will always be with you. One thing I can always give, Is the gift of friendship for you to accept. Allow our friendship to make you smile, Bring joy to your life as you have to mine. When you become confused and lose your way, Let me guide you in the right direction. Lean on me when you need support, Let me share your sorrow and pain. What good can a friend really be, If you cannot understand we will always care. If I call you friend, You will always know, A friend you have in me.

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