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  SST (01/26/10)

  The Importance of Walking
  
  
  Walking can add minutes to your life.
  This enables you at 85 years old
  To spend an additional 5 months in a nursing
  Home at $7000 per month.
  
  My grandpa started walking
  Five miles a day when he was 60.
  Now he's 97 years old
  And we don't know where the hell he is.
  
  I like long walks,
  Especially when they are taken
  By people who annoy me.
  
  The only reason I would take up walking
  Is so that I could hear heavy breathing again.
  
  I have to walk early in the morning,
  Before my brain figures out what I'm doing..
  
  I joined a health club last year,
  Spent about 400 bucks.
  Haven't lost a pound.
  Apparently you have to go there..
  
  Every time I hear the dirty word 'exercise',
  I wash my mouth out with chocolate.
  
  I do have flabby thighs,
  But fortunately my stomach covers them.
  
  The advantage of exercising every day
  Is so when you die, they'll say,
  'Well, she looks good doesn't she.'
  
  If you are going to try cross-country skiing,
  Start with a small country.
  
  I know I got a lot of exercise
  The last few years,......
  Just getting over the hill.
  
  We all get heavier as we get older,
  Because there's a lot more information in our heads.
  That's my story and I'm sticking to it.
  
  AND
  
  Every time I start thinking too much
  About how I look,
  I just find a Happy Hour
  And by the time I leave,
  I look just fine.
  
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  SST (12/21/09)

  IF A FAT GUY DRESSED IN RED GRABS YOU AND PUTS YOU IN A BAG,
  DON'T WORRY,
  I TOLD SANTA I WANTED A GOOD FRIEND FOR CHRISTMAS!
  MERRY CHRISTMAS
  and
  HAPPY NEW YEAR
  GREAT BIG OLE GRIZZLY BEAR HUGGGZZZZZZZZZZ SQUISHHHHHHHHH LOVE YA
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  SST (10/20/09)

  Subject: Acts 2:38
  A woman had just returned to her home from an evening
  
  of church services, when she was startled by an intruder.
  
  She caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its
  
  valuables and yelled: 'Stop! Acts 2:38!'
  (Repent and be baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ, so
  
  that your sins may be forgiven.)
  
  The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly
  
  called the police and explained what she had done.
  
  As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked
  
  the burglar: 'Why did you just stand there? All the old
  
  lady did was yell a scripture to you.'
  
  'Scripture?' replied the burglar. 'She said she had an
  
  ax and two 38s!'
  
  
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  SST (06/18/09)

  LITTLE JOHNNY STRIKES AGAIN..........
  
  
  
  The teacher asked the class to use the word "fascinate" in a sentence.
  
  Molly put up her hand and said, "My family went to my grand dad's farm, and we all saw his pet sheep. It was fascinating."
  
  The teacher said, "That was good, but I wanted you to use the word "fascinate, not fascinating".
  
  Sally raised her hand. She said, "My family went to see Rock City and I was "fascinated."
  
  The teacher said, "Well, that was good Sally, but I wanted you to use the word "fascinate."
  
  Little Johnny raised his hand. The teacher hesitated because she had been burned by little Johnny before. She finally decided there was no way he could damage the word "fascinate", so she called on him. Johnny said, "My aunt Gina has a sweater with ten buttons, but her tits are so big she can only fasten eight."
  
  The teacher sat down and cried!
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  TheOtherJIM (02/14/09)

  Happy Valentines Day Lotus1 !
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  SST (01/17/09)

  THE WEDDING NIGHT Fred and Mary get married but couldn't afford a honeymoon, so they go back to Fred's Mom and Dad's house for their first night together. In the morning, Johnny, Fred's little brother, gets up and has his breakfast. As he is going out of the door to go to school, he asks his mom if Fred and Mary are up yet. She replies, 'No'. Johnny asks, 'Do you know what I think?' His mom replies, 'I don't want to hear what you think! Just go to school.' Johnny comes home for lunch and asks his mom, 'Are Fred and Mary up yet?' She replies, 'No.' Johnny says, 'Do you know what I t hink?' His mom replies, 'Never mind what you think! Eat your lunch and go back to school .' After school, Johnny comes home and asks again, 'Are Fred and Mary up yet?' His mom says, 'No.' He asks, 'Do you know what I think?' His mom replies, 'Ok, now tell me what you think?' He says: 'Last night Fred came to my room for the Vaseline and I think... I gave him my airplane glue.'
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  SST (01/09/09)

  Never take someone for granted Hold every person close to your heart Because you might wake up one day And realize that you've lost a diamond While you were too busy collecting stones
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  Iroam (12/30/08)

  Happy New year! To a "good enough" year ,right?
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  pamkays (12/24/08)

  wanted to stop by and Wish you all the best and a Very Merry Christmas, love pamkays xoxoxox sorry I haven't been around much my Dad died recently and I had back surgery, I hope you are doing well.
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  neptune26 (12/18/08)

  Warm hugs for you too Liz. Hope all is well with you.

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