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overtherainbow 
9:46pm, November 9, 2009
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I poured my heart out to God in sincere prayer.Just before I closed my prayer I thanked God for letting me have cable TV because it was the only pleasure I had due to not being able to get out of bed many days.The next morning the landlord cut our cable off, saying it will no longer be provided as part of the rent.I have not a penny to my name, no converter box, old school tv , so I can't watch anything at all now.Why did God after two years of free cable only take it away after I thanked Him for it? Can someone please explain this to me?Seriously, I wan to know what ya'll think.---I think God has turned His back on me and wants me to give up and die.It seems I just am being given just enough food and needs to keep me alive to suffer.I never have fun, laughter, happiness, love, never.All I get is to suffer in pain every day alone.No one cares, or helps me, I never have enough gas to go anywhere except the grocery store, that's it.What did I do ,God has forsaken me.I beg for health, so I can work, a friend a real one I can touch, I beg for a mate, I beg to be able to buy simple things like shampoo, God never helps me.The only way I get anything is to beg my poor old mom living on social security to help me buy it and she always makes me feel like a dog for it, so I try to do without.A lot of people who are more able than me get a SSI check ,but I can't get one.I honestly think that I am dead and am being tormented and that I am living in hell.I give up.I am trying to get surgery done and I pray I die during it, if I can, I think I am already dead.I have seen nothing to prove otherwise for years now.I want to see if I can die, so I can sleep in the ground and maybe wake up in a better place, or at least a different hell.I tried to overdose that didn't work, so I am trying death by surgery now, if that fails I am going to walk out in front of a tractor trailer truck going down the interstate.I hate my life.I begged God for forgivness and to let my life get better, he never helps, He only takes away more every time I ask for help or sincerely thank him for something He spits in my face by taking away anything that I like I like, care about, or that is good in any way.God only wants me to suffer as I have my entire life after 50years of suffering I have had all I can take.I'd rather be dead.All God will give me is food via food stamps that is because every single time I eat I get sick with horrible cramps 30mins. after I eat , that last all day or all night.No pill or doctor in the land has ever been able to find or fix this, 50 years of cramps , bad child birth like cramps,How would you stand it?I tried to kill myself to end my pain and the stupid doc treated me as a drug addict and did not even adress my real promblem.I hate life.I hate judgemental humans too.I want to die, that's why God won't let me die, if I was begging to live, i would die then.Why do other people get to have pain free lives and never me? Why do others get tohave money and love, and a good man, and never me?
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HI I ONLY HAVE A MINUTE,BUT I AM TELLING YOU TO GET A SSI LAWYER,THEY WILL FIGHT FOR U,THEY ONLY GET PAID IF U DO,AND IT USUALLY IS RETROACTIVE.PLEASE TRY,U HAVE TO HAVE REPRESENTATION,IF NOT U WILL GET TURNED DOWN AS MUCH AS THEY CAN,SO THEY DON'T HAVE TO PAY.ALSO WRITE A LETTER TO YOUR'E CONGRESSMAN,IT CAN'T HURT TO TRY.YOUR'E LANDLORD IS AN ASS.I DO NOT KNOW ABOUT LAWS IN OTHER STATES.In OUR COUNTY YOU CAN GET HELP IF U HAVE AN EVICTION NOTICE,IF U R HOMELESS IT DOESN'T WORK THAT WAY.I KNOW IT IS CRAZY,BUT SO IS OUR GOVERNMENT,DO NOT GIVE UP, WITH RESPECT,LOVE YA LOT'S connie xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
SEMPERSUGAR
Frankly, what experience I have with landlords is that they tend to be heartless @#$#@s, but perhaps turning off the cable was a cost cutting measure taken in lieu of raising the rent.
God has not turned his (assuming God has a gender) back on you, nor forsaken you. God has nothing to do with your situations or their solutions. Have you ever heard of the Law of Attraction? I don't mean the glorified, think-yourself-rich-quick, "The Secret" type of LOA, but the real one that is at the root of all the positive motivational material.
In a nutshell, the universe (aka God) gives you what you ask for without regard to the consequences of that gift. Now that may seem quite simple on the surface, but it is very complex underneath. It does not mean you can say "Give me a million dollars" or "Take this cancer from me" and you immediately become a cancer-free millionaire. The universe delves deep into the core of your request, to the subtle, probably unconscious thought that created it. It is that thought, called the "sponsoring thought" by Neal Donald Walsch in his Conversations With God book, that the universe works on. That is what determines the "answer to your prayer".
You beg for health. The sponsoring thought is that you are ill. You beg for money. The sponsoring thought is that you are broke. You beg for a mate. The sponsoring thought is that you are hopelessly alone. You beg for death to end your misery. The sponsoring thought is you have a miserable life. The universe gives you what you truly are asking for, your sponsoring thoughts.
There is no quick, easy, or simple solution to your current situations. The solution is complex and takes time and almost constant effort. It involves changing your basic thought patterns from lack and supplication to abundance and generosity, regardless of the actual physical conditions at any specific moment.
Please note that what you need and what you want are not necessarily the same. Also, what you need and what others need are also not the same. You have what you need. You have always had what you need. If you had not, you wouldn't be here today. Perhaps it did not seem to be enough, but that is based on your wants, not your needs. Be grateful in your core that your needs are met. Give gratitude every day to the universe (aka God) for the abundance that meets your needs.
You may be saying right now that I have no clue what your life is like and that you have little to be grateful for, but I've been homeless briefly and on the edge of it for an extended time, and have gone days living on water because I had no money for food. But I was given what I needed when I needed it and I am still here, so I have an idea of what I'm talking about. Change your sponsering thoughts and you will change your life.
Blessings of abundance and peace to you. ((((hugs))))
taowalker
Doing a random act of kindess for someone else and God will give you a sense of peace and an inner feeling of comfort. Share your gifts. Yes, you'll have to find them first. God bless you
hnanny
What a coincidence,overtherainbow, I've just met you while I'm watching Wizard of Oz. Hugs to you!
hnanny
Thank you all so much for your kind suggestions.
overtherainbow
Taowalker, THANK YOU! You wrote a lot and I appreciate it, I am going to take it to heart and try to do as you suggested.Thank you for taking time to explain this to me, makes sense too.
overtherainbow