MRNmom's Journal

I just wanted to share with you my experience at Faith's Lodge this past weekend.  I'm not sure if any you have not heard of it, but it's a retreat in Wisconsin for bereaved parents and families... www.faithslodge.org 

I like most of you was dreading mother's day.  This was one of 3 holidays I was lucky enough to spend with my sweet boy last year (along with Father's Day & 4th of July)  I heard about Faith's Lodge last year from my therapist and wanted to go, but as time went on I kind of forgot about it.  So when my friend Sara mentioned to me she was going Mother's day weekend and that they had open spots, I jumped at the chance and filled out an application.  We were accepted to go and I couldn't have been more excited.  I didn't know what to expect, but I knew it would be better than sitting at home and being sad about not having my son with me.

So we left Friday afternoon and arrived there around 2...this place was just as amazing as the pictures.  It was a beautiful cabin nestled in the woods overlooking their private lake.  It was just as beautiful inside too, with 4 different floors...huge kitchen, sitting room, craft room, library and at the very top another sitting room.  We all had our own private suites with every amenity you could imagine and our own balcony overlooking the lake.  They even had sleep number beds :)

Although every week is different, for our days there they had two authors (both have children who were born still) come out and facilitate 2 group sessions.  One of them was the auther of "Empty Arms"... I actually received that book from First Candle after Mason died.  A group called the Thimbleberries donated quilts that we got to take home.  There was a masseuse that came on Saturday.  They had a bunch of arts and crafts for us to do in remembrance of our angels.  I made a bracelet and a stepping stone for my garden with Mason's name on it.  You could also paint birdhouses (donated by the boy scouts) and my hubby etched a piece of wood with our family name on it.  They have a bridge on the "trail of inspiration" that is called the bridge of hope.  They gave us small heart shaped rocks that we got to decorate with our baby's name (or whatever we wanted) and place on the bridge so that our children will always be a part of Faith's Lodge.  There was so much more, they had every activity you could imagine and you could do as little or as much as you wanted.  It was a weekend to re-connect with your significant other, a time to remember our babies and to meet other parents who tragically have lost a baby too.

The weekend completely exheeded our expectations, even my husband who is usually closed up about his feelings and never wants to do anything like this, really enjoyed being there.  He opened up so much during our group discussions and he even told "our story" to everyone.  I was so proud of him and I even heard him talk about things he has never even told me before!  There were 6 other couples there who lost babies (3 of us to SIDS, 1 stillbirth, 1 pre-mie, 1 sick baby)  They were all so wonderful and we all got along really well!  On Sunday, they even gave us Mother's Day flowers (in pots of course).  It was just such a wonderful way to spend my weekend and to honor my son and remember and share how VERY special he is!

This place is open to any family, parent who has lost a child (20 weeks gestation to 19 years).  Their year is divided into weeks for specific types of losses and who would be coming, some weeks are for families, others are for parents who lost a child and our week was for infant loss.  Each week it is a max of 8 sets of parents/families so it isn't just a huge group of people, it's pretty intimate and quiet.  I highly suggest to anyone who is willing and able to go, you should do so!  In addition to everything they give you, they also feed you and there is no cost to be there although they ask that you make a min $25 donation per night if you can.  You can go back once per calendar year (the loss must be within 3 years altho they have a week scheduled for ones that have been longer than that) and we most definitely will be back there.  I heard it's beautiful in the fall and winter!