Trisha26's Journal

I joined this site hoping to meet people who can understand that taking things "a day at a time" is the hardest thing ever asked of me. I have an amazing family, wonderful friends, and a great team of doctors and nurses who treat my daughter. But they all see me as the mom who never loses her smile, and keeps it all together. Arrgh!! Every evening for the past month all I do is cry. I was told in the beginning of June that my daughter's cancer had returned after a 3 month remission and that she was already in a final stage 4. She's back in chemotherapy after having just finished 13 months(Dec 06- Jan 08). And you know what.. she's okay. She does what she has to do, she never complains and is never without a smile. She has only 4 more therapy sessions left (thats all the toxicity her body can handle). And thats what's making me Crazy right now! This time clock that's ticking away, when its done we have no more treatment options for her. So here I am trying to live a day at a time, but at the same time fight the clock by worrying about tomorrow. I fill all our days when not in chemo by doing everything I can with her and make it real quality time for her as a normal kid.  And I feel like anything but normal.