im0ftheuniverse's Journal

I keep getting emails about updating my goals and it has been two weeks for this one, maybe a few more on my other goals.

I finally talked to a new doctor. She doesn't know why the old docs put me on the other meds that are in her words rather outdated tech. She really highly recommends the zoloft and as soon as my sinus infection clears up, I'll be starting it all over again.

I have had a lot of bad bouts of crying, not being able to get out of bed, not really caring about anything, not eating or wanting to eat at all... just everything is bad bad bad bad bad.

I've been feeling more down on myself and more worthless and more embarassed that I'm not strong. Instead of opening up and communicating my thoughts, I run here and think and spill the tears but not the words. I cannot say that actually talking about things will make them any better. I know how ridiculous some of my negative thoughts are. It feels like saying them would make me even more down on myself... but I should try. 

Maybe I'll fiddle around with the webcam again...