glad christmas is over
December 27, 2008 3:21am
it sucked big time. I didnt even take a shower. now gotta deal with new years eve which is also my wedding anniversary
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richswife
1:57am, November 22, 2008
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About Me
richswife
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About Me
I'm a 46 yo retired Police Officer. My husband of 3 yrs 5 mths died on May 12th 2008 of a drug overdose. The Police believe it was crack and methadone. We live on Long Island and he was at a "friends" house in Brooklyn who was a heroin addict and on methadone. I never knew my husband to try methadone. He also had needles and a empty bottle of methadone in his pocket which I never knew him to use and I think could have been planted. He also could have been given a hot shot in his sleep for all I know but the police believing he was a "junkie" didn't investigate any further. The toxicology report should be ready now but I am afraid to get the results. He was put on a chair with wheels and put in an elevator on the 1st floor and dumped on the 6th floor in a hallway with no ID (he always slept with his wallet safe in his pocket). His "friend" and another guy were arrested for moving the body but it was just a health code violation and I don't know what's happening with that case. The police were called at 5am and said he was dead for 12 hrs at that point. They called me in the afternoon (24 hrs after he died) and just said "we found your husband DEAD" So I was not married, a widow for a day and didn't know it. I had to go to Brooklyn to the ME's office to identify the body, thankfully they show a picture nowadays. I have no support since my family are very straight and didn't know about his drug use. They now believe he was a piece of garbage and I'm better off without him. His friends are all drug addicts who want to just forget about it because it reminds them of their own mortality. His family (a aunt who's a nun and a brother) believe he was a saint and a great husband, which he wasn't. I found out alot of secrets he had hidden after he died. Like affairs he had and "friends" of his who I never heard of and who never knew he was married but had been to my house and had met my dog. Though I had a rocky relationship with him I loved him with all of my heart and dreamed we would work everything out and grow old together. This was the first marriage for both of us and we had no kids. I miss him so much I don't want to go on without him.
I'm a 46 yo retired Police Officer. My husband of 3 yrs 5 mths died on May 12th 2008 of a drug overdose. The Police believe it was crack and methadone. We live on Long Island and he was at a "friends" house in Brooklyn who was a heroin addict and on methadone. I never knew my husband to try methadone. He also had needles and a empty bottle of methadone in his pocket which I never knew him to use and I think could have been planted. He also could have been given a hot shot in his sleep for all I know
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i miss you
November 22, 2008 2:07am
Rich,
i miss you. i miss you, i miss you, i miss you, I wrote you a poem/song dont know, think it could be a hit, lol, no i really do i wish you …
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death by addiction
November 22, 2008 1:23am
death by addictionNow I'll never know if you ever really loved meNow I'll never know if you ever really caredyou were ripped from me with …
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started with a grief counselor
November 12, 2008 2:51pm
I started today with a grief counselor. I really liked her a lot . She didn't just sit there and listen to me but gave me a lot of …
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feeling like i am different
November 12, 2008 1:35am
so far the majority of people ive reached out to do not understand how i feel. except for a few people here and in my f2f berievment group i cannot …
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Hugbook
Ray of Sunshine
I too have been hit by a double whammy of death and secrets. You might want to look at ywbb.org under "special circumstances" to find others in our situation. Take care.
Flower
I'm sorry for your situation: having life 'displace' you suddenly is difficult because of all the unresolved confusion you are experiencing. Your hubs does not look like a stereotype of a druggie and I am so sorry this should befall him. Good luck, I'm rooting for you!
Hug
Just came across your profile, so sorry for your unimaginable loss and the past year you must have gone through, I hope things are looking a little better for you.
Hug
I hope that this year brings us all a new found happiness and sense of hope. Hang in there.
Present
Wishing you peace this Holiday season and coming New Year. With Love Cindy
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Support Groups
Close Widows & Widowers
I lost my husband of 3 1/2 yrs on May 12th 2008 of a drug overdose
Close Bereavement
Type: Loss of a Partner/Spousemy husband of 3 yrs 5 mths died of a cocaine and methadone overdose on 05/12/08 I miss him with all my heart and don't know how to go on without him
Treatments
- Crying Not Working
- seem to cry at the drop of a hat
- Getting Angry Not Working
- have holes in walls all over my house gets me dpressed
- Grief Counseling Considering
- have to get to a meeting
- Pets Somewhat Helpful
- my black lab "Vincent" is a life saver
- Remembering Somewhat Helpful
- like to think of the good times and smile or maybe laugh
- Support from Friends & Family Not Working
- everyone wants me to just get over it
- Support Groups Working / Worked
- this web site is my first support group so far the stories are making me sad
- Talking Working / Worked
- i find people don't want to hear my sad story
- Time Working / Worked
- hoping this will work
Open Families & Friends Of Addicts
46 yo widow lost my husband from a drug overdose on 05/12/08
Treatments
Open Pet Bereavement
my best friend my dog "vincent" as in Van gogh died 11/09/08 my husband also died 6 months before this. I had Vincent since he was a puppy 10 yrs ago he was a 105 lb black lab. I didnt even know he was sick he died in my home.
Open Depression
Type: Clinical (Major) Depressioni have suffered from depression for as long as i can remember have tried all sorts of treatments as well as 5 hospitalizations i totally believe it is a chemical imbalance though i still blam myself for the depression which makes it worse
Treatments
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Not Working
- Cymbalta Somewhat Helpful
- Effexor Somewhat Helpful
- Positive Thinking Not Working
- Prozac Working / Worked
- Psychotherapy Not Working
- Seroquel Not Working
- Support from Friends & Family Not Working
- Trazodone Not Working
- Wellbutrin Not Working
- Writing Not Working
