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12:07am Yesterday
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About Me
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Gold Star
thats so cool with the whole translator thing i was thinking about the same thing i wanna learn Korean thouhg lol Japanese is so cool too i wanna learn that also but i don think i would want a job like that for my base incomei want something more stable... i should have gradute this spring too but hey issues come up...im sure we both will get back on track though...im thinking about diverging from school for a while i just need life experiences i want to say i've done this and that because as a child i didnt live much so i want to make up for that time...im thinking about so many options now but i dont know if i will fall through with themas of yet.... volunteering is aswesome i want to do more of it but i need to have a stable job and see where things are going first its amazing how much we have in commom lol...i like working with people to an extent...and subway is enough lol...its okay with the customers its just i struggle with having interesting conversations with the co-workers so im trying to find a job that i can probdeal with customers but not so much contact with co-wokers i know its weir but ill look into to it...im just not good with getting to know people on a personal level talking with people i will never really see again is cool but the other way around scares me...idk its weird but ill stop rambling lol..i like levaing you message your an awseome person =)
Hug
*Hugs*
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Gold Star
lol i would love that type of job its like i want to be around people but sometimes i dont...so i think having a job dealing with people and having one not really dealing with people would do me fine...yes im working at subway and as i said looking for another job i need more money...and yes im going to school for early childhood education what about you? are you currently in shcool? nothing else atm with me i want to volunteer but i need to find stable job postitions first then i will look into volunterring...
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Gold Star
You give great advice you know that =)... i love it when someone gives me great advice i will really look at it as a steping stone like all the times i do hang out with people and i think its a disaster...i can say im closer to finding a good friend...all i really want is a best frined i can talk to and hang out iwth often i think that will make me happy....
i didnt do anything for halloween either i did have plans but it didnt go anywahere i only have a few frineds and no one seemed to be interested in doing anything so i just stayed home and went to sleep after feeling really depressed...so you work? where do you work at =) i hope you have a great week =) 
Hug
just because.. read some of your replies... truly helpful... so adding a thank you too:)
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Goals
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Support Groups
Close Depression
Type: Seasonal Affective DisorderBut not just SAD, sometimes little things make me depressed. Like to a crazy extent. But general depression only affects me in the "winter" months.
Treatments
- Effexor Not Working
- Didn't really help - made me a bit less modd-swingy but also made me suicidal in a "my body wants it" kind of way.
- Meditation Considering
- I've done it some before but... it's hard to stick with and to really do when you're going crazy-upset
- Positive Thinking Somewhat Helpful
- Only really helps me keep it away, doesn't really make it go away.
- Writing Somewhat Helpful
Close Rape
Happened on 09/06/09. Two people know besides people on here. In the process of stuff with police and in the process of coming out of shock/realizing the affect it has.
Open Self-Injury
Well I've only "officially" hurt myself once (scratched my arm until it was a cut) but I've also banged my head off walls and dug nails into my skin. On a smaller scale, for as long as I remember, when I get stressed I peal at the lose skin on my fingers which is semi-ocd-ish and semi-self injury. It's just automatic, I've been doing it so long. I'm not bad but... I just want to realize that the small things are still not good and to know ways to cope if I'm tempted to hurt myself again.
Treatments
- Rubber Bands Somewhat Helpful
- But unless I want to scratch myself or I guess bang my head off walls, it seems like the same kind of thing in a possibly less harmful package. Though I've never literally used a rubber band. (Hair ties... don't recommend)
Open Financial Challenges
blankpaper hasn’t entered any details for this support group.Open Physical & Emotional Abuse
It's over now but not like I knew it was happening when it was. (I fall into the emotional part here). I do want to talk about it but at the same time..... I don't like to admit it. Still dealing with
Treatments
- Forgiveness Somewhat Helpful
- Still leaves me with things to deal with but... not I'm not dragging my anger (and him) around with me. Definitely helps.
- Leave Somewhat Helpful
- Left and then realized after wards. Side effects: none really but... dealing with the fact that I'm still blaming myself.
- Talking Somewhat Helpful
Open Breakups & Divorce
It would make it easier on my emotions but I dont think hating someone just so you can not love them is healthy. And besides that I dont want to close a door. I want to move on but that doesnt mean I have to burn a bridge
Treatments
Open Panic Attacks
have had SUPER minor ones from random things without really realizing but since... well 9/6/09, I've had more and with more intensity than ever before.
Treatments
- Effexor Not Working
- Didn't help at all, basically turned anxiety that wouldn't even really cause an attack into a crying fit. Plus, made me suicidal and emotionally unstable so... yeah
- Patience Somewhat Helpful
- I guess they end eventually... =/
- Positive Thinking Somewhat Helpful
- Yeah for only as long as I can "ignore/forget" the issue.
- Xanax Too Soon to Tell
- Somewhat, I'm not sure if my dose is strong enough though as it only helps with minor things - specifically, the stomach ache you get when you're not thinking about the stress-or anymore but you're body's still reacting. But I've only used it 3 times so we'll see.
