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socalmom61 
5:53pm, June 22, 2009
After several agonizing months, I decided it was best to resume taking antidepressants.
I tried so hard to live life without them.
But it really wasn't fair to my family, friends or to myself to live the way I've been living.
I always tell people that they would treat other illnesses with the right medication so why wouldn't they treat their depression? It's always harder to take my own advice.
Anyone who lives with depression knows how it feels. The onset is beyond description.
It comes on without warning and stays until it's finished with you.
The aftermath can be devastating.
It's exhausting and unrelenting.
It steals away the person you think you are.
So, I've been making some other changes like eating differently and walking a little bit.
Working in the garden helps.
Talking to my friends here helps so much.
Just being able to put this down and having at least one person understand makes all the difference between complete isolation and emotional breakdown or the sense that there is a light at the end of this tunnel.
So thank you for that.
I should have gone in earlier instead of being so stubborn with myself.
I don't know what I was trying to prove.
But it didn't work.
I could blame it on outside influences like my back pain, but sometimes, it's just an inside job.
Coping skills. That's a big one.
So for now, I've gotta do what works and for me, that's going back on my prescription and starting to live in the light again.
Comments
Whatever you have to do...
At least in the grand experiment, you know for sure it worked before.
And eating more healthfully and doing what exercise you can, is never a bad choice.
Hugs and Mojo...
Weebs
KweebsLS
Good for you :) Love you Kathy big hugs!
listless
You know what tho Kathy, you needed to figure this out on your own.. And you did, and thats big.. I'm proud of you and you should be too.
Rowan
Ah, a break in the clouds. WE all know you deserve to be happy as you can - glad you broke down to see it too. Love you
PaganChild
Kathy I no what you mean .But as you can see we are all with you on this .
DebbieSC
I think sometimes we have to try things out for ourselves, just to be sure that a particular path is really the one where we are better off. Sounds like you did that. Eating differently, walking a bit, working in the garden, being in touch with friends - sounds to me like you have excellent coping skills. Even if you can't always find them, they are there, inside of you.
Beesley
Your own advice is good Kathy. There is light at the end of the tunnel and you're doing the right things to reach it. I'm very proud of you for taking charge and making positive changes. You're a beautiful person and friend. We're all with you in this.Love you!
Lesa
Thanks for sharing these thoughts with us, Kathy. For me I went off of my meds for 2 days and I couldn't believe where I ended up. It's not fair to the people around you, equally it is not fair to yourself.
fredk
You have done yourself proud Sweetie, so walk tall and take the credit for a wise choice made.............oxoxox
carolmj
I definitely understand, Kathy! And I'm glad you're doing what you can do to help yourself. You're a smart woman! {{{HUGS}}}
ArtsyLady1