DAY 1 This is the beginning of …
DAY 1 This is the beginning of what I hope will be the next best part of my life. I struggle with an addictive …
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AnnualGecko 
I really have lost all will to live. I haven't been taking my tablets, have been getting high most nights, no sport, cant bring myself to do much, no energy, no life, no happiness, just loneliness... I hate to be so depressive, I hate reading things like this other people have wrote... I also hate being me. My life is ruined, not by anyone else, I have no one to blame... No one did much bad to me, I just ruined it all, single handedly, myself... People say you are only young, you have so much ahead of you, but I dont. I have no will to do anything, I have no insperation to get anywhere, I have no motivation at all. I can't do anything for myself. I am finding it almost impossible to work now too. I cant bring myself to put the hours in. Right now I just want to cry. I don't want to be alive anymore, I really, really dont.
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Okay son....this is NOT YOU talking, this is the depression taking over. You have GOT to pull yourself back out of this bout just like you did the last one. Look whee you were for the past 3 days. Sober, not doing to bad and then what....you started drinking again. ALCOHOL IS A DOWNER! It is your enemy. It might seem like your friend when your wasted and feeling no pain but when it wears off your left flat on your face again in a bigger hole than you already were in. These bouts of depression are getting worse. When your not playing ball then I know your not good. Honestly honey you need to go to the doctors and get on an anti-depressant and TAKE the damn things. You need to do this for YOU. Those little magic pills replace a chemical in your brain that your not getting enough of. Okay, so there's side effects, but trust me, they far outweigh what your going through now. You can deal with it and you can find the right medication that works best for you, but you CAN"T do it on your own. You know son that I will always be here for you as will your sister and the rest of our little family here on DS but we're not close enough in person to smack you silly and get you through this, so let's talk so we can get you through this.
imallalone
hey xxxx i know how angry it feels when someone says 'I know how you feel', but i think i really can say that, honestly.xxxxxxxx hate will ruin you. hate and anger and fear and negative thinking is behind all this. as well as being intelligent. being clever and seeing things for what they realy are will make u depressed. cant be helped but our ways of thinking can be.....
hope you feel better soon xxxxx im on msn if u wanna talk x
girl199017
I fecking love you mate. x
mrsblobby
Hun, stay away from booze and whatever drugs you might be taking to get high. They screw up your brain chemistry so bad . You really need to get back to the dr. I am worried about what you are writing here. Please get help asap. You need to get back into treatment for your major depression pronto. Hugs.
mianutzy