Trying so hard
I am getting my life back. I have been given a 2nd chance & I am not going to blow it. I have been taking care of …
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Laura20 
1:24pm, October 25, 2009
this is really testing me.I woke up @ 6 am in agongy. I am not going to get out of hed today. Whats the use? I stopped ad about a week ago. maybe it was'nt such a good idea.I am trying but this may be bigger than me. I dont want to live but I will hang in & not do anything stupid. How many times do I have to go down this road?
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Hey Laura, you said you stopped ad about a week ago. What is ad????
Is it anti depressants???? I hope you did not stop them cold turkey. I don't think you should mess around with them without the drs advice. I am soooooooo glad that you will not do anything stupid. You sure had me worried there. Who knows how many times people have to go down a certain road or two? We all have crosses to bear, and I will keep on praying for you. Life never promises a rose garden, and that is for sure. I always said the worse thing that could ever happen to me would be to lose a child. The second would be to have a child addicted to hard drugs. So when my daughter came to me at 21 years old and said, "Mom, I am pregnant", I did not think much about it. Where someone else might have a conniption, I quietly asked her what she was going to do, and she smiled and said "get married of course". Well Itold her if she would have married him anyway that was the right thing to do. She has been married for almost 12 years now, has a beautiful home, and a loving hubby, and has given me three beautiful grandchildren. They are all happy and healthy, and for this I thank God. This is what I meant yesterday when I said that you have to count your blessings. Although I live in pain 24/7, I try to focus on the good things in my life. It does help to get through the day that way. Like I said, you are in my thoughts a prayers, and I am hoping that they will be answered. Love Selina
SelinaM
Hang in there Laura!
Panadeine
Hon, I so feel for you...I'm not sure what "ad" is, but I hope that your actions lead to you a different place that has some answers.
I thought about you looking into local support groups to find others that are afflicted with what you have, but you've prob. already gone there, maybe, & it didn't make a difference. I've been down that road, too...it's nice to know that you can make tangible contact with someone who has the same issues, but at the end of the day when you go home alone, it's still very true that you are still stuck w/the same problems.
Any chance that some of your meds are cross-contaminating each other and causing some of your discomfort? Is that why you went off of "ad?"
Also, even tho it may be very tiring, when you get a little bit of a remission, is there another m.d./clinic that you could go to, for a third opinion? It's prob. from watching "Medical Mysteries," but Mom and I talk a lot about how some m.d.'s mean well (and some that are too busy), but don't know about updated information/tests that could mean everything to their patients...
Laura, I am keeping your wishes in my heart and hoping for everything good for you!
rushfan74