Journal

So school ends next Saturday for this semester. I am a bit nonplussed by it really. I’m just finding it harder to care about school. Not that I don’t appreciate learning something, it’s just I’m failing to see the point after being in school for the last 18 or so years now. On the flip side, I’ve been feeling better. Had a few down days, but the up are outweighing them right now. The trick is to keep it going. All in all I’m doing better, which is probably the best thing anyone in position could ask for right now.

Other than that I’ve been reading and watching DVDs like their going out of style. Saw and read some good ones, and saw and read some bad ones as well. Still even though I am feeling good and doing great, I still get the feeling that something is going to come along a spoil it.

*I'm finding more and more older poems that I wrote. Here is another one from about 5 years ago.

Please Listen

When I ask you to listen to me

and you just give me advice,

you have not done what I asked.

When I ask you to listen to me

and you begin to tell me why I shouldn't feel that way,

you are trampling on my feelings.

When I ask you to listen to me

and you feel you have to solve my problems for me,

you have failed me.

Listen!

All I ask is that you listen. 

I wrote this about 4 years ago, but forget about it until I was poking through my old journal. Now I am sharing it with you guys.

I AM

I am a poet writing of my pain.

I am a person living a life of shame.

I am your son hiding my depression.

I am your neighbor making a good impression.

I am your friend acting like I'm fine.

I am wisher, wishing this life wasn't mine.

I am a child who thinks of suicide.

I am a teenager pushing the tears aside.

I am a student who doesn't have a clue.

I am the one sitting next to you.

I am asking you to care.

I am the best friend hoping you'll be there.