Journal

    Hi all just thought I'd get a few lines down and start catching up a little at a time. I hope all of you wonderfully caring people are doing as ok as you can be??

I have really missed this and am so thankful for all the messages and hugs that you all sent I really appreciate them.

The Chronic Pain Clinic has come to an end and it was a useful course and so good to get together with others who know how it is to suffer pain. They gave us lots of input on Pacing and splitting tasks into chunks and not beating yourself up over things and still doing what we used to do only doing this differently and it all made alot of sense but talking about it is easy it's the doing it that is so hard especially with life and kids etc to deal with aswell!!

I have been in contact with a lady who is setting up a local FM group and am really looking forward to becoming involved in it,our first meeting is later this month,will be sure to let you all know how things go.

I am still using the T.E.N.S. machine and finding it especially helpfull when pain in my lower back gets bad. The meds are still the same just juggled things round abit and am on water tablet now too,may help with swelling? Got to try EVERYTHING that may have any chance of helping eh!!!

I have joined Slimming World aswell to see if it will help with my weight as I am so down about it right now,I have gone from a size 12/14 to a 20/22 in a year and it is so upsetting,and it really knocks my confidence too,the whole body image thing,still as I said I am doing it with support now and last week was my 1st weigh in and I lost 31/2Lbs so it's a start and I am trying really hard with walking everyday too!!!!!

I hve found one thing very strange though, I have never been a 'good' sleeper but it seems that now I just fall asleep,no warning,and NO stopping it,I just go to sleep and when I do wake I feel awful. Not sure if it's the FM or what!!??!

I am off for a double appointment with my GP on thursday morning and am hoping that she will be of help with my worries. I have made a complaint regarding one of the other doctors at the surgery but it looks very much as if it was just a waste of time as I have not heard anything...

I had an emergency clinic appointment with him and I was made to feel like a fat, lazy, hyprchondriac and will NEVER see him again.

OK well I am off to srt myself ready to collect Siobhan so I will be popping in to catch up on some more journal entries later.

LUVS N HUGGGGSSSSSSSSSSSS XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXxxxxx

I thought I would get a few lines down while I am feeling a little better and the house is actually quiet for a couple of hours,but if I drift off the subject in hand I appologise as I find concentrating really quite hard,I guess the meds along with the constant tiredness an the dear fog!!!!! all take their toll huh.

I was so moved by everyones good wishes and hugs and messages I sat reading them with tears streaming down my cheeks.I am warmed to my heart to know that so many wonderful people think about me and care about me I want to say thank you to all of you,thank you for being so wonderful.

I am struggling through this rough patch as best as I can and am grasping at the fact that it has to end soon,this will pass and then things will get easier.........................

It hs been so difficult with Anthony being away too,it willbe three weeks when he comes home Friday and I can't wait to see him,and touch him,talk to him,be with him,Alas it will only be for the weekend and then he is off again,he just phoned to say they have another two weeks work there so I will only see him for 4 days and that will be over the weekend when we have all 5 kids here!!So just when I get a little light at the end of a very dark and very long tunnel something comes along and blows it out!!!

Anyway, I have a place on the self-management pain course at the pain clinic and that will mean two days a week for the next 6 weeks at the hospital,I hope it is worthwhile,,I will go with open mind and as positive an attitude as I can muster each day and just see where it goes!!

Ok I am really starting to loose it now so I'm checking out here and sending HUGE,warm,wonderful,soft snuggles to you all and Thabnk you xxxxxxxxxxxxx