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BZberta 
7:27pm, July 17, 2009
I went to my PAH doctor yesterday. She told me that the fibrosis in my lung has worsened. Also it is taxing my heart. I sort of knew that things were accelerating and that I am feeling a little worse. The thing that bothered me most was the fluid. My stomach feels full all the time even though I don't eat that much. I am trying to stay off of salt. Also she mentioned that the vein in my neck is extended. We will find out in a couple of months if some of this is due to my scleroderma or PAH or both.
I still believe and know God knows what it is all about and I just place my life in His hands. Whatever He has for me I know He will be with me.
Sorry this is such a let-down entry but it's just how I feel right now.
I pray that God will help me to think on things that are good, positive and give me an outlook on Him. Love and Prayers, Berta
Comments
Hi Berta,
Sorry to hear that your visit to the doctor didn't go well. I think we all seem to have ups and downs and at the moment I'm lucky to be feeling quite well. The veins in my neck (both sides) have been visible since a while before I even went into hospital and nobody seems particularly bothered about it! I hope that you start to feel better very soon - Sandi x
SandieG
Thanks Sandie, I know you have had a lot of hard times. Thanks for the encouragement. I am glad to hear you are doing better.
BZberta
Hi, I am sorry to hear this too. I have been less able to walk as much but force myself to walk with Koko. Sometimes just getting outside helps alot. I agree with you that no one knows when our time will come so I must leave it to God. The one thing I do know about this disease is that stress exacerbates our illness, and learning to relax and trying to find things that make us happier are crucial. Humor and a good belly laugh are very good for the soul too. Today has been an unexpected day with my youngest son over fixing his car. Seems every week-end one of my kids or grandkids are over... I like it, but some days would just like to be alone. It is important to remember that doctors and medical professionals really don't know much about scleroderma so for them to give us time limits, etc, is not accurate or fair to us. Each situation is different and I have been told that scleroderma patients can get better from other sources. I have gotten much better than I was,through many different things, so I hope that helps you to know that. I am not special. I am no better or worse than the rest of humanity. But I do believe that just as I got this disease I can find healing from it too. Trust in what you believe. Take care Berta and have a good week-end. love & hugs, Toshie
kokoinmn