Going within-
April 20, 2009 11:27pm
have reached my 90 day milestone,I've beeen to re-hab got kicked out on the 42 day mark.
basically the last 90 days has been miraculous …
BeeRokka
6:36am, January 11, 2009
-
About Me
BeeRokka
-
About Me
Sober date25/12/008- last drink 40oz Bottle of Vodka.-woooo-weee! on xmas eve-giving me a sobriety date the same as Jesus Christ Birthdate! Grandiose by nature I designed my own re-birth into recovery in-conjunction with the coming of a master!! which means little toward my sanity most days because I have the disease of self-centred, alter-egoism, and low-self esteem-which is a mental illness-So i find myself restless irritable and discontented more so than Jesus most probly, regardless of how hungover i was on the anniversary of his birth!-And so it was that I spent 21 days smokefree and alcohol& drug free, and within this timeframe i recieved an admission date to re-hab!! yes re-hab(duh)-And so a week before going to re-hab my anxiety level began to rise the anticipation of sober living psyco-therapy hugging and bonding with a bunch of crackpots queer's and fallen women for 18weeks I decided to give opium and marijuana free rain in my life for 5 days leading up to my admission into Re-hab! continued in my profile-somewhere(grin)
Sober date25/12/008- last drink 40oz Bottle of Vodka.-woooo-weee! on xmas eve-giving me a sobriety date the same as Jesus Christ Birthdate! Grandiose by nature I designed my own re-birth into recovery in-conjunction with the coming of a master!! which means little toward my sanity most days because I have the disease of self-centred, alter-egoism, and low-self esteem-which is a mental illness-So i find myself restless irritable and discontented more so than Jesus most probly, regardless of how hungover
-
Interests
Newly Sober- 5 months up-i can say I'm most interested in Money the making of, the acquisition of, and the spending of money!!this obsession is just what's on top today-lucky for meetings where i realise this aint my primary purpose only a fantasy attached to me dillusion of life-lol- other interests vary day to day-
Newly Sober- 5 months up-i can say I'm most interested in Money the making of, the acquisition of, and
-
-
Recent Activity
Recently:
-
1 hug received
- Sorry, there is no activity in the My Activity feed.
-
-
Journal
This entry is private
This entry is private
-
This entry is private
-
TODAY-SOBER AND POSING THE QUESTIONS
September 11, 2008 3:46am
wELL i ENJOY BEEING A NICE PERSON A TENDER CARING PERSON ,aT MY BEST-i CONCEED ,
I have an equal depth in other areas of my character which when I go …
-
Hugbook
Hug
Happy Wednesday - hoping all is well with you.
-
Hug
Happy Wednesday
Miss You
YAY Bee, hows the job going? See the GF on the weekend? Storm deserved I say. Hope your well. :}
-
Well Done
Your back at work? Whooooo Bee that's great.Your lifes coming together yeah. Spring cleaning huh. Come and do my house lol. Bee you just made my day mate. Damn good to hear your doing well :)
-
Hug
Always blessed my friend. Hope you are doing well, it's great to hear from you!
-
Photos
BeeRokka hasn’t uploaded any photos yet
-
Advertisement -
Goals
-
Support Groups
Close Depression
Type: Clinical (Major) DepressionHi this is a follow on from my Main profile-I am a recovering Alcoholic & addict-Also though my Depression kicks in 7 has done since my early teen years I'm 34 now not on any medication really trying all helpful treatments bar drugs-I've spent my life time trying to run away from depression -speed methamphetamine addiction made me feel motivated obviously,& giving all the uppers away I'm falling in & out of the depressions..As it hits me for days now not weeks-with Help..Beerokka!
Treatments
- Cognitive Behavioral Therapy Working / Worked
- waste of my time -just my experience -
- Meditation Working / Worked
- average have to give it more effort
- Positive Thinking Working / Worked
- The most beneficial for me when I'm good I'm good-And sometimes it does'nt matter what I think-but when I get really bad-I have to do something to see the sunshine behind the clouds!
- Writing Working / Worked
- It does show me how rotten my mind gets!A disease of negativity is what I call it-And it's all rubbish when I'm in the blues-I have to be really dilligent with what I allow myself to think
Open Anger Management
I'm 34 male Kiwi-"Nuclear-POWered-Psychotic" Outbursts-Thats it in a nutshell-I've had my life threatened by Gangmembers-And then I became the the Animal-I used to say prayers of war & something else took over-a physical presence foreign to me would take me through any scenario- I regularly pray now that jesus will dispell my demons & any unhealthy spirirts from my mind ,body & soul,my house,& all round me-Last time I bashed a girl-Prior to that I all but killed a guy-change has to take place!
Open Smoking Addiction & Recovery
am 73 days smokefree now!
Treatments
- Nicotine Gum Working / Worked
- will see if it works has done in the past
- Nicotine Patch Working / Worked
- Has worked in the past
- Support Groups Working / Worked
- Fingers crossed
