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poetryangel 
2:31am, July 1, 2009
hello friends,
well today was my follow-up n i found out the reason i have a huge black spot on my face is b/c the skin is dying there it is not a match so we r gonna have to do this all over again n their gonna take skin from somewhere eles in order for it to work, i have been upset all day. i feel like i can't do anything rt not even w/a dr.s help. i knew i was ugly but now i am gonna b scar ugly, i just can't seam to stop crying, n my oldest daughter n husband don't seam to matter to them. i just want to give up on everything. y do i keep trying when i am just a failure. ty for listening to me cry again.
Comments
I am so so so sorry
boston2
Hi Poetryangel,
It is so hard to feel out of control. This is a bump in the road, not the end of the road. I am so sorry for this additional challenge, but it too will pass. Give yourself a pat on the back for dealing with it - not everyone has a successful graft for any number of reasons. it is NOT your fault.
You are conquering cancer - it is a fight sometimes. You are not ugly - I feel that way too sometimes - but it is a lie, not truth. Learn to recognize negative statements about yourself as "untruths". And for every thought you have about yourself that is negative, counter it IMMEDIATELY with a positive one. Don't let the negative junk pile up.
I learned to love my scar actually - sounds weird maybe - but to me it was a reminder that we all are wounded, emotionally, spiritually, and/or physically, but that we can be healed. A scar is a mark of courage, victory, perseverance, love, patience and PROGRESS.
You are worthy and you are loved. Never forget that.
Blessings,
karen
Shawscove