New location, New outlook
April 5, 2009 11:17pm
Well, we have finally moved away fro Ft Hood, or Ft Hell as I will continue to refer to it as. We moved to Va a couple of weeks ago, and I feel …
Progress
90 %
vsing1029
10:59pm, April 5, 2009
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About Me
vsing1029
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About Me
I am joining this group to hopefully find others who have been through what I have. I am 24, with 3 children and a husband who is active military.
I am joining this group to hopefully find others who have been through what I have. I am 24, with 3 children and a husband who is active military.
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Recent Activity
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Journal
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This entry is private
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Poem from last night
December 20, 2008 9:53pm
So last night as I was falling asleep I was writing this fucked up poem in my head about cutting and killing, weeping, and fighting, everything that …
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damn nightmeres
December 3, 2008 5:14am
I have ben doing so good the past couple of days with not wanting to cut, being in a great mood, actually doing my hair and make upand then tonight I …
This entry is private
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Hugbook
Hug
Thank you for the hug...and a double-hug back to you. Your situation was NOT your fault. I think when we've been assaulted it is such a hard thing to understand inside of us. I felt shame and horrible inside..and the perpetrator has suffered nothing. We need to be good to ourselves and not continue the hurt they did by hurting ourselves. You deserve that for yourself! Take care of yourself.
Well Done
Thanks for the compliments. I worked out today for a first in a very long time. And it felt good. I was sweaty and itchy at first but now I am no longer sweaty or itchy. I have Chalene's Turbo Jam. I got it last year for my birthday. The husband bought it for me. He must love me a lot! I lost my libido and I am trying my husbands advice. He says if I get more active that it will return. I am hoping that what he says works because now that I am thick in the waist I can barely keep him off of me.....and I feel so ugly and guilty that I can't fulfill his desires.
Hug
hey.. i just saw your pic and youre very pretty! i hope you have a good day ((((HUG))))
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Prayer
hello.. still thinking of you and praying for you. *HUG*
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Hug
just to let you know i'm thinking about you. i hope youre having a better day today. *HUG*
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Photos
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Goals
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Support Groups
Close Rape
While my kids were visiting my aunt and grandmother for the weekend our new neighbor invited me to come watch a movie with him and his wife, after he had made a few heavy passes at me, and he had to many drinks in him I decided to leave, his wife insisted that he walked me home and as much as I fought him walking me home he did. I entered my home alone, and he said he would like to help me put away the movies we had taken out earlier to take to their house. I told him that I would take care of it in the morning, he said no no that he wanted to help me clean up the mess. He walked into the door, shut and locked the door behind himself. I went into the kitchen thinking I was a good distance away from him, and told him that my husband might be online seeing us in the webcam (my husband was in Iraq when then happened and out only form of communication was through to computer) he walked over to the webcam and yanked it out of the hard drive and said that "your husband doesnt need to see me have sex with his wife" I uestioned what he meant and he backed me into the counter in my kitchen where he there began to sexually assualt me, and then raped me.
Treatments
Close Self-Injury
I cut myself, and am struggling daily not to continue...it's very very very hard.
Treatments
- Psychotherapy Somewhat Helpful
- If i could find a good doctor..it'd help.
- Red Marker Not Working
- Didn't make a difference...nothing is the same as blood.
- Rubber Bands Not Working
- Didn't do any good
- Squeezing Ice Considering
- Talking Somewhat Helpful
- depends on who I talk to
- Tattoos Working / Worked
- Love them..would be covered in them if I could.
Open Bipolar Disorder
I have a history of cutting, depression, anxiety and I currently seeking support on DS for myself, and some advice on my child who I think is bipolar.
Open Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder
I was raped in may and have been diagnosed with PTSD. My husband is in the military so me carrying this Dx is rough. I feel like after everything he's been through he's the one who should be having a difficult time.
Treatments
- Paxil Working / Worked
- hospital took me off of it...damn idiots
- Talking Working / Worked
- Helps when I can find people who don't think I am crazy, and people who don't think I need to be admitted because of the way I feel.
- Remeron Working / Worked
- helps me sleep still have nightmeres but its harder to wake up with it
- Physical Exercise Working / Worked
- helps get out the aggression when I can get to the gym and not be disrupted by my children
- Depakote Too Soon to Tell
- I dont really notice a difference unless I dont take it..then I am a mess.
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Groups
