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RememberKala 
6:43am, November 8, 2009
On my list of things to do yesterday was of course grocery shop for Thanksgiving. A difficult task for me. Thanksgiving is Kala's favorite. She'd order Thanksgiving dinner all throughout the year asking me, "Mom, will you cook thanksgiving for dinner tonight?", meaning of course she was in the mood for turkey and dressing. But I always thought too, it was a little more than just her taste buds needing nourishment. I always thought perhaps she was in need of a little extra "family" nourishment. Afterall, that's what Thanksgiving is all about, family and thankfulness.
So, yesterday I ventured to town with my list in hand. On the drive, 30 minutes, I thought of several other "very important" things I should do before going to the store. Like roaming around in Target for an hour or so. Then I decided I just had to go to Kohls and roam around in there for another hour or so. Next I thought I would go to the cemetery, so I did. After that, to the florist. Then I called my SIL and asked her to a late lunch. After lunch I was out of "things" to do and quickly running out of time, so I headed for the grocery. I grabbed by buggy and off I went, isle after isle, end to end, round and round, and started over again. I managed to put a few items in the cart even though I was walking around in a blur. Then I heard my name being called. I turned around and my Tammy was there. She took one look into my eyes and grabbed me. We stood in the isle hugging, saying I love you, as shoppers passed by watching. I didn't care. I needed her and she was there.
It always amazes me how she just shows up when I need her most. There's no way she could have known I'd be in that store at that time! Just like the time I was in Wal-Mart and was getting info from the photo lab. One employee told the other employee that my daughter had just passed, that employees response was "bummer". I went into hysterics! I was crying and screaming and pitching such a fit. I was escorted out by the manager....who was very nice and showed compassion. As I was driving home, crying way to hard to have been driving, I heard a horn blow. I looked over and there was my Tammy! We pulled over, stood in the parking lot of a bank, crying, hugging, and saying I love you. She was just there, just passing through my town, at that exact moment in time.
So, I have the turkey and the ham to bake this morning. I'll be Ok today because today is Kala's day. Her favorite meal will be prepared and I will smile. I will be thankful for my life and the many blessings I have and have had. I will dedicate this day to my beautiful Kala and I will make her proud of her momma.
Dear Torrey,
Another Thanksgiving without you too. Last year you were being such an ass to me. So hateful and selfish. I know the drugs had everything to do with it, but it hurt when I told you that I'd been in an accident and your response was "cool". Now, this year, you sit in a jail cell on Thanksgiving. I just can't get my head around it all. But, today is not about any of that, today is about my love for you and how thankful I am to be your mom. Yes, even still. I love you and always will. I will think of you and Kala sitting across from each other toasting the day with your wine glasses of iced tea and giggling at each other. I pray we have a Thanksgiving in our future where you and I can sit across from each other and raise a glass in toast of your victory and accomplishments. I look forward to that day. I love you son, more than you can possibly understand.
Forever, mom
Dear Brice,
I love you my angel boy. I thank you so much for your visits to me. I've been given a great gift by seeing a glimpse of you. I so wish I'd been able to hold you in my arms, but please know, I have held you in my heart for all these years. I will toast you today and smile at the thought of the day I will truly know you. I love you son.
Forever, mom
Comments
I'm sorry for the confusion. Noah is not a part of my family....well, not my earthly family. I do not know him nor his family. I only posted this because a post was made asking us to sending him Christmas cards...his last request. Since many moms did do that and some others were planning to but later found out his parents had requested no more cards, I thought I'd let everyone know that Noah had crossed over to the next life.
This is what Noah's mom wrote on his care page:
After a long battle with Stage IV Neruorblastoma cancer, Monday morning at 8:02 AM, Noah Biorkman passed away at his home in South Lyon, Michigan.
Scott and I, along with our families, would like to thank everyone for the continued support over the past few years during Noah’s illness. As most of you know, Noah has received more than one million Christmas cards over the past few weeks. The outpouring of love and compassion has been remarkable and we are extremely grateful. We are now asking for everyone please respect our privacy during this very difficult time. The funeral services will be for family only. We are asking that instead of sending cards and flowers to Scott and me; please make a donation in Noah’s name to either of the organizations below. With your donation, Noah’s legacy will live on for many years to come, if not forever. Thank you so much for your support and love.
Sincerely, The Biorkman Family
Please send donations to the following: Department of Pediatrics and Oncology University of Michigan 1500 East Medical Center Drive D4202MPB Ann Arbor, Michigan 48109-5718 Checks payable to: The University of Michigan – Noah’s Pediatric Oncology Fund
OR
Make-A-Wish Foundation of Michigan 230 Huron View Blvd. Ann Arbor, Michigan 48103 Checks payable to: Make-A-Wish Foundation of Michigan – Memo: Noah Biorkman
Comments
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teri,
Please accept my deepest condolences for all of Noahs friends and family. Hugs, Inga
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For those who may not know, this is the little boy who'd asked for the Christmas cards that Pat (tomtom) told us about a week or so ago. I just thought I'd post his mothers latest care page post so everyone would know and say a prayer for the family. We all know how very difficult the days ahead will be for Noah's mom and dad.
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My deepest sympathy to Noah's family.
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My deepest sympathy. My son past away due to cancer and I can identify with what cancer is capable of doing. Much love.
MQT
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I am so sorry to hear of your loss. My thoughts and love are with you and your whole family.
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God bless this family. Thank you for informing us.
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So very sad, I send my deepest condolences.
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Teri,
Please accept my deepest condolences for all of Noahs friends and family. Hugs from afar. Mary
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God help you and am so sorry for your loss. am sad for you . i feel what you feel mom it is so hard. God help you really .
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Please let them know that their grief is our grief with understanding of their pain. Also to know the depth of what cancer can to to a childs body and mind is heartbreaking and we are all here to support and prayer for her and her family. thank you for sharring and I am truely sorry for her and the families lost. I HATE CANCER! IT IS THE ONE THING THAT I CAN SAY I HATE!...TO MANY CHILDREN TO MANY PARENTS TO MANY FRIENDS TO MANY GRANDPARENTS...THIS NEEDS TO STOP...PLEASE
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Thanks Teri. Another member :(
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Thanks love... my heart goes out to them all..
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Thank You Teri. My prayers are with the family.
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Wishing the family the best in this time of grief.
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Very sad. Thanks for letting us know.
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my prayers are with the family at this most difficult and private time.
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My friend - you are so much stronger than me and your grief is much fresher than mine. You seem to know what to say and what to do wherein I feel like I am like a hamster in a ball, just going around and around - never getting anywhere. I am fighting with myself about whether to write to my son or not. He has had several chances to get a hold of me but hasn't so I don't know if I'm ready to be disappointed again. I hope that your son is as strong as you are and is able to learn from his mistake and I hope that he gets the counseling he needs. I feel so sorry for Noah's family. Thanks for all you do.
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Thanks for posting the update Teri. BTW, Make
a Wish Foundation is sending my nephew, his sister (who was his bone marrow donor) and my youngest sister (the mom) on a cruise next year. Christian was diagnosed with AML (the worst leukemia) when he was one year old. HIs older sister was a perfect bone marrow donor and Christian was pronounced cancer free when he was about 6 years old. They pronounce them cancer free after 5 years. He is now about 9 years old. Make a Wish is just now sending him on a trip because he was too young and too sick back then. Love, Belinda
Heading out shortly for a fun time with friends. Going bowling, then dinner, then card games. Guess the meds have kicked in, I'm feeling pretty good today.
Monday got her cast off and is doing much better. She's even being nice to Maui once again.
Roger has had great success with his new fireplace insert invention, so he's a happy camper too.
Looks like we're all feeling good and in good spirits at the same time. Definately something to celebrate!
Hope everyone is doing good and enjoying the weekend.
Comments
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So happy to hear the weekend is turning out well for you! Keep it up and rejoice in the few moments/hours/days of happiness!
Peace and blessings ~ Debbie, Corrie's Mom
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I am so happy to hear you are feeling a bit better.. thank you for sharing my love enjoy your day and glad everyone is happy.. love to you my warrior princess...
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Very happy to hear things are going better. My husband has been outside putting up the Christmas lights. They are really obnoxious Santa waving and Santa in a sleigh (waving) with reindeer. He hangs them on our big long fence - we live along an interstate so they wave at the folks driving by. I hit what was supposed to be a rummage sale - it was actually one of those country home - tupperware party type thing - open house. I was hoping I might find a nice McCoy planter - nope. May walk the dog(s) a bit later. It is very windy but about 50 degrees so we will have to see. I think I will braid my hair and put one of my nerdy winter stocking caps on - you know - the ones that look like norwegian flight helmets with braids of yarn hanging down on the sides...all the kids think they are great and then they were those with flip flops on their feet! GO FIGURE!?!!??!!?
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Teri, I am glad to hear the joy, the peace, the excitement....I am glad for you...now, go have fun. Love to you...Dale, Brandon's Mom
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Teri,
Always glad when one of us has a good day. Hugs, Inga
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So glad your having a good day. Have fun & enjoy your night out with your friends. ...Hugs, Connie
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Teri...enjoy yourself !! I'm glad to see you sounding happy !! Hugs, Kim
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I am glad you are enjoying yourself and that the Yorkies are doing well once again. Love and hugs to you. Belinda
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I'm so happy you had a good day, I'm looking forward to when I'm able to have one. Hope you enjoyed it. Love to you Teri. Bev
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I'm so glad that you are enjoying yourself. Keep the spirit and be safe and enjoy. Love Sanita
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Glad you're feeling better and things are in sync. Take Care. Love, Dawn
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Good to hear you're doing well. Love & hugs
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:) xxoo
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I am so happy to hear that you are doing better. Love you Camille
Past Entries
Goal Updated
I love you my WP.. my memories today hold you up...
munrogirl
It is very Hard,I know your Pain. I don't have family so I am cooking a turkey breast for John and I,it's taking ALL my strength to do it.I MISS my Penny so bad,she loved the Holiday's because we were together.I cry all the time ,too,even when I don't know I am going to do it,in places I don't care either what people think! Try to have a good Thanksgiving,Kala is with you. Love & Hugs Katie
pennysmom
Teri,
I attempted the grocery store yesterday and wish I hadn't .The traffic in general was much more aggressive and I could not wait to get home. Hope you have a peaceful day . Hugs, Inga
ihart
How wonderful to have Tammy. Someone knew you needed her and when you needed her so how awesome for the timeing. I pray you have a wonderful holiday filled with peace and hop. Love to you dear friend. Robin
Robin4
That's great that Tammy was there when you needed her. I too am going to try to be strong today and make Doug proud of me. Love and hugs, Sue
dougadoug
Tammy always seems to be around just when you need her most. I think Kala may have something to do with it. Prayers for Torrey and your family.
tomtom
I think Tammy is your guardian angel in the flesh. I pray that your son and my son know how much we miss and love them no matter what they have done. Here's to hoping a complete recovery to both of them and hoping that our girls are with us in spirit today and maybe, if we're lucky, come back to us in a dream soon. I wish you a happy thanksgiving and the courage to enjoy it.
BarbaraWawa
We are parents. Like our Father in heaven, we love our children unconditionally and when they need discipline we only apply it with our love. This is what Torrey will hopefully learn from this experience. You love him and want only the best for him.
I am so glad you could do the positive thing and make it Kala's Day. What a wonderful way to observe this tradition...making it new yet keeping it the same. Your Kala was happy for you. She is loving and hugging her mom...I toast you, Teri, as you accomplish cooking Kala's favorite foods and making the most of today. God bless you...He loves us and our children...we are all His.....Dale, Brandon's Mom
Kingsdaughter
Wow...you have a special angel in Tammy....love you...Karen
biowoman
Yes you do have a very special angle there...Hugs, Connie
ConH
Teri, You are amazing....Tammy is amazing and I think Kala knows just when you need Tammy beside you !! Love you my friend ! Kim
KimRW
I have GOT to get me one of those Tammys!
ColleenF