dallasheather's Journal

Had to go back to Dallas a couple weeks ago after getting the news that my Grandmother had just passed away.  Have not felt up to getting on here and talking about it to anyone until now.  While she was elderly and not at all in good health, it was still a big blow to our family because of how close it was to Mom's passing.  (My dad and his mom, my Mema, passed away only 5wks apart back in 2001... now my mom and her mom, my Grandmother, passed away only 10wks apart!) 

I'm having a really hard time coping with the concept of having NONE of them around anymore... No parents OR grandparents to talk to or get advice from or hear stories about how my son is just like so-and-so...  I found a group on here after my mom died called Adult Orphans, which is a sad but appropriate term.  While I knew and pretty much expected them to pass before me obviously, I did not expect them to be gone before I ever even reached 40.  How do you get over NEEDING them???  When I get stressed out and overwhelmed with sadness over all this, I want to call my mom and have her tell me everything's gonna be okay.  My birthday is coming up in a few weeks, and will be my first one where I wont here "the birthday story" of the day I was born told to me by my Grandmother.  :(

.... gonna cut this off now.  Too hard to write about this anymore.