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BipolarEmperess 
1:25pm, July 8, 2009
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I can feel myself drowning in self-pity. Which turns into depression.Which it classified as a "down period"
Tips on how to get out of this funk?
I have already increased one of my mood stabilizers.
My pysch-doctor says if I increase my anit-depressants , it can interfere with my other medications.
I can't sleep at night.
And sleep all afternoon.
When I do sleep , I am practically knocked out.
I can not hear a thing. The only way for me to awake in shaking me.
In other news , my parents are canceling my gym membership and getting me a treadmill.
It is useful in the winter. I usually walk around my neighborhood.
But , with weather 16 degrees and below...its a no no.
This week we had 8 INCHES of snow.
We can't even go outside.
I hate the blistering cold.
Maybe , its because I am from Guam.
A tropical paradise near the Phillipines and underneath Japan.
I look white because my dad is half.
You can say that his genes are more dominant than my mother's.
My birthday is also in ONE DAY!
I am quaking with excitment.
Hopefully , if the snow melts a bit my family and I can watch a movie and go out to eat.
Thats our tradition.
Well , Happy Holidays.
Comment/Advice will be greatly appreciated =]
Becca
UPDATED GOALS
Comments
Oh my god , my dad keeps calling me fat ass and everytime my mom looks at me she just gets this really grossed out look and says "why don't you go to the gym"
Its really starting to lower my self esteem.
When I say that I mean , I can't look at myself in the mirror without calling myself a pig.
And even my DOCTOR said most of my weight gain was from the former medicine I was on , Risperdal.
I used to be skinny , 5'3 and 110 pounds now , I'm 5'3 and 150pounds.
Ugh ,is it possible to feel so ugly on the outside because of you parents?
I know I'm fat , but gosh , they shouldn't tell me that every five minutes!
Becca
UPDATED GOALS
Comments
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why would any parent tell there own kid they are a fat ass,wtf. thats not right. Anyone one can make you feel ugly but its your choice to beleive them or not! My son was on risperdal and yes it does that.YOUR a BEAUTIFUL young lady, and if your happy thAts all that matters
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Hey I know what its like to have her parents call her fat, fat ass, etc.. but Chargersmom is right you can't let other people decide what you look like. Honestly you have to believe in yourself and not what everyone else says
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oh my gosh. i hate that! my step mom and my dad started saying that to me too, you can't let it get you down though!! i mean, i know personally how hard it can be, but realize that they are the ones who are acting CHILDish. that's not right at all, and they should know better, no offense to your parents, i'm sure they obviously care about you, however there is no excuse to tell your own child that they look fat. that's horrible. and just for the record, you don't look bad, or fat, or so on. Not at all. People have this image they think everyone should live up to now. But whatever. I think that curves do not make ppl fat, and they are much better to have any day than skin and bones.
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I see see a pretty girl...& read the words of someone who can express them selves well...
150lbs is not a lot...I know you feel that it is...but it is not "Gross"...
I feel for you that your parents make you feel that way...May be they don't realise that they are effecting you...If I was you...I would tell them how it makes you feel...
Love Karen x
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omFG what is it with girls and weight i know a gir labout your hight and she weighs 185lbs and i will not sugar coat this she gives me an I beam in my pants given most of the weight is in her chest but i hate tiney angry twiggey bitches who use being atractive as an excuse to b a bitch >.:P i girl i like has the same problem she expects me not to like her becuase she feels she is big and she refuses to realize that i like her for her flaws
Past Entries
| July 2008 |
Friday, 7/25
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May 2008 |
Tuesday, 5/27
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Goal Updated
take an alergy medication with drowsy side effects that helps me sleep through the night or atleast untill dawn.
KingEmo