MEREATTA's Journal

  LAST NITE WAS A MISERABLE NITE !  I HURT MOST OF THE NITE AND DIDN'T SLEEP WELL. I GOT UP AT 4:30 AM AND MADE MY ELLY MAE COFFEE AND WAITED ON EVERYONE ELSE TO GET UP !  I ENJOY THE QUIET TIME BUT, I ALSO ENJOY WHEN EVERYONE IS UP MOVING ABOUT GETTING READY FOR THE DAY !  MY YOUNGEST DAUGHTER SPENT THE NITE AND I TRULY ENJOYED HER COMPANY. SHE RECENTLY MOVED TO NEW ORLEANS SO I DON'T GET TO SEE HER AS MUCH AS A MAMA WANTS TO SEE HER BABY GIRL .  NOW, EVERYONE IS GONE AND I SIT ALONE WITH MY COMPUTER , LONELY, WISHING AND WAITING FOR EVERYONE TO RETURN HOME !  SO, I FIGURED THAT I'D WRITE HERE IN MY JOURNAL .

          I HAVE TO WRITE THIS DOWN THO' MY DAUGHTER AND GRANDAUGHTER LIVES WITH US, WELL LAST NITE MY SWEET GRANDAUGHTER TELLS ME THAT " I'M THE BEST MEME IN THE WORLD ! " AGAIN ! :}  I CAN NEVER HEAR THAT ENOUGH ! :}  HOW WONDERFUL THAT MAKES ME FEEL !  SHE'S BEEN GOING THRU SOME HARD TIMES HERSELF, SHE HAS TO CHANGE SCHOOLS HERE AT THE END OF THE SCHOOL YEAR AND WON'T GET TO GRADUATE FROM KINDERGARTEN WITH ALL HER LIL FRIENDS . SHE'S BEEN UPSET, AND HER MOM HASN'T REALLY BEEN THERE FOR HER. MY DAUGHTER HAS BEEN TOO INVOLVED IN HER OWN PERSONAL PROBLEMS TO SUPPORT HER DAUGHTER IN THESE TROUBLED TIMES. SO, I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO KEEP HER UPBEAT, AND LOVE ON HER JUST A LIL BIT MORE AND TRY TO MAKE HER LAUGH . MY REWARD FOR MY EFFORTS ARE ALOT OF "I LOVE YOU MEME" AND HUGS !  PLUS AFORE MENTIONED "BEST MEME IN THE WORLD !" :}  MY HUSBAND HAS BEEN VERY SUPPORTIVE OF ME WITH MY EFFORTS TO MAKE A 6 YR. OLD LIL GIRL FEEL SAFE AND HAPPY. HE HEARS ALOT OF " I LOVE YOU PAPA ! "  TOO ! :} PLUS,  I'VE BEEN TRYING TO SUPPORT MY DAUGHTER EMOTIONALLY ALSO. SHE'S A TOUGH COOKIE ON THE OUTSIDE AND A FRAGILE PIECE OF GLASS ON THE INSIDE. SOMETIMES I FEEL SO STRETCHED OUT .........................I CANNOT MAKE EVERYONE I LOVE HAPPY ! I DO THE BEST I CAN BUT, I CAN'T CONTROL THEIR EMOTIONS !  I'VE GOT A HUSBAND, 5 KIDS, A STEPDAUGHTER AND MY BROTHERS ~N~ SISTERS AND THEIR KIDS !  I WANT THEM ALL TO BE HAPPY !  I PRAY FOR THAT EVERY NITE. I PRAY FOR PEACE IN THE WORLD !  SOMETIMES I DRIVE MYSELF CRAZY WORRYING ABOUT ALL OF THEM  AND THE WORLD IN GENERAL !

        I GOT A CALL FROM MY LIL SIS LAST NITE THAT REALLY MADE ME FEEL GOOD !  I LOVE HER SO VERY MUCH AND MISS HER MORE THAN WORDS CAN SAY !  SHE IS IN THE MILITARY AND STATIONED IN TEXAS RITE NOW.  I WISH WITH ALL MY HEART THAT I COULD BE IN HER PRESENCE, SHE ACCEPTS ME FOR WHO I AM AND I ACCEPT HER FOR WHO SHE IS !  WE ALWAYS HAVE A WONDERFUL TIME TOGETHER . IT'S THE KIND OF RELATIONSHIP THAT WE CAN RIDE FOR HOURS AND NOT SAY A WORD AND BE SO CONTENTED. THAT'S HARD TO FIND !  I HAVE TO FIND  A WAY TO SEE HER BEFORE NEXT YEAR, SHE GOES TO IRAQ AND I MUST SEE HER BEFORE SHE GOES !

       SOME MORE GOOD NEWS IS ....THAT MY SIS THAT LIVES IN ILLINOIS, IS COMING TO VISIT NEXT MONTH ! I'M EXCITED ABOUT THAT !  :} AND MY LIL BRO' WHO IS IN THE MILITARY AND I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO SPEND AS MUCH TIME WITH AS I'D LIKE IS GETTING TO MOVE BACK TO LOUISIANA !!!!!! YEA !!!!! :}

THAT REALLY MAKES ME HAPPY ! NOW, IT WILL ONLY BE A 4 HR. DRIVE TO GO SEE HIM AND HIS FAMILY !  I CAN'T WAIT !!!!  HE'S VERY SPECIAL TO ME . 

     I TELL YA, I'M SO GLAD THAT THE LORD BLESSED ME WITH ALL THE FAMILY I HAVE IN MY LIFE !!!  I WILL TELL YOU ABOUT THEM ALL IN MY NEXT JOURNAL ENTRY .

                 GOOD BYE FOR NOW ,

                 JOY TO THE WORLD  ,

                 ALWAYS JUST ME,

                 MEREATTA