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darrylk 
this weekend i went climbing at lovers leap in tahoe. i love camping in tahoe. it feels so remote in this campground. really beutiful big trees, lots of rock. i brought a portable dvd player and mp3 player and never used them, i was just enjoying the moment. it felt so serene and wonderful to be through with tx and outside climbing big rock. i pushed myself to lead some pretty intimidating climbs, and it felt so good to climb free! i climbed with g, and in some respects he is like me, in recovery, also facing health issues. in others, he isnt. he is more negative than i am, kinda angry, and looks at climbs a little differently. it worked out to be a pretty good balance although i wish he was a little more positive, i had to work a little to remain positive and not feel like it was my fault that he was in certain moods. it helped me to get a little perspective on myself though and to realize that i have come a long way since i first got clean 14 years ago. alot of which i learned from mentors like jim e, and scott k. men i respect and seem to love life and look at life in a very positive manner. my parents always look at life very negatively. they watch the news 4 times a day, always the same negative stuff, and so every time i talk to mom she talks like the world is ending. of course their religion teaches the same thing so it must be true. i realize i have the choice to view the world through several lenses either the dark and scary lens my parents choose or the more rosy lens that jim would use. i like the rose colored lens. 
UPDATED GOALS
Be a happy person
Progress 100%
Encouragements: 1
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took my last shot this week. going into gi for last time this morning. last night i looked up the half life for ribavarin online and found out its 12 days!. i thought it was 12 hours. kinda dissappointed it will be in my system this long. i do feel less edgy and prickley from not continuing to take riba although i still have the rash on my right hand. cant wait to quit breaking out. i am glad that interferon clears the system quicker. the interferon is still kicking my ass! i felt a little better yesterday but was still feeling confused and not like being around others. my legs also really hurt, probably overtrained by doing carpenter hill on thu, dark hollow fri, callahans climbing sat, roxy-cherry lane sun, jacksonville hill mon. all hill climbs every day! i am a sucker for punishement! rested my legs yesterday. today ive got errands to do, doctors, bank, grocery kinda all over town. i think that will probably be the extent of my workout, try to give my body a little break. i still have to decide if i take the hill on the way to the docs or take it easy on the bike path. a little spinning my be a good warm up. i have some specific things to bring up to the doc today. i want copies of all my bloodwork, i want to know how my body will react after tx, want to know about lunesta and getting off lunesta and buspar. i need a plan to deal with withdrawl and change in scedule. without being slammed on tue, wed, thu, fri by interferon how will i cope? i need to check up on job apps, especially ashland outdoor, mountain supply, joes, big 5 and blackbird, sportsmans warehouse, radio shack, larsons. i have about 10 weeks to get my ducks in a row and hopefully get a full time job that will last a few years that helps to satisfy my desire to help others, get outside more, and stay healthy and fit. its kinda amazing that i love life this much! God has blessed me in soo many ways. even in tx i learned more about myself and others than i ever could have without tx. i will continue to grow and learn from my experience.
UPDATED GOALS
Be a happy person
Progress 75%
Encouragements: 1
Add your supportcant believe i am almost done with this tx! went climbing this weekend, did a 10 pitch climb that was pretty easy. i led over half of it. it felt really good to be leading again. kinda over did it. went to ride an easy spinning ride on sunday just to get a little exercise in between climbs and i almost turned back 3 times on an easy ride. when i got home i really crashed and didnt feel like moving the rest of the day. sunday night finnally got some climbing lined up at rattlesnake, the hardest area locally ( wasnt sure why i committed to this ). but on monday felt better. got warmed up on split decision, the clam, then did an 11 sunset arete! then i led janevier ( which really got my heart pumping !). then we did soundtracker which felt really hard especially the roof. then i did great bear which felt incredibly smooth, i couldnt believe how good that felt. then i took my shot last night and felt the heavy effects of interferon, i always almost feel normal by monday, even though i was still reacting to riba with rash and itchiness and taking allergy meds to keep going. then tue and wed, really challenge my sense of well being with the interferon. but i am almost through with all of it. hopefully with proper nutrition and excersize, i will be flushing these drugs out of my system along with adjusting to life without them. i do love the fact that ive gotten out soo much this summer, and i do hope to continue when i get back to work. i think a workable schedule with weekends free to climb or ski or hike will be really important. i also want insurance, (dental would be nice). i need to plan for a future, (profit sharing) retirement pkg. so hopefully i will get a job maybe working with scott for a future of mountain supply. maybe working the outdoor store and learning more about tele ski. or maybe joes and learning more about bikes and motorsports. many options available. just have to be open and willing.
UPDATED GOALS
Be a happy person
Progress 75%
Encouragements: 1
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