Wilo's Journal

Months have passed, life has evolved. So many things have changed in my life. A long time ago none of this seemed possible. The only thing I could feel was the pain and confusion from beating up on myself. I am my own worst enemy sometimes.

After evolution, however, I have a very positive cause now in my life that I am committed to. I know it will be a part of my life as long as I am alive. It feels good to have this and how I now can help other people. I feel like I can make a difference again.

A few weeks ago I met a woman. She is so nice, friendly, and has such a beautiful smile. She caught me with it. Her words when she writes are bright light in my life. She has a way of saying very thought provoking messages and making me at least smile. Some of her messages make me laugh. We have gone out a few times and spent a lot of time together. She has already met my younger sister. I have tried to tell her about my weird things and how bad I am, but she is not so convinced. We walk and take it easy. Talk and even held each other's hand. We have hugged and understood each other. She is great and I enjoy her company. I didn't think I would  ever get here again. She is a couple of steps ahead of me. While I am not afraid of her, I am afraid, and I am confused. I want to let her in and I am trying. I remember the hurt and so it's difficult to know what is safe. 

One day at a time. That's all I can do.